sensory

I am so coked out right now. and I didn't intend for it to be this way, to be in this state. but I would do it again. sigh, that's the problem with me and powder.
I'm lonely, even in a group of people. my life is changing, so much I don't even recognize myself sometimes. I don't know where I am going, where I will be in a year, 6 months, next week.
it's all going so fast and I'm losing people at an alarming rate.
I'm going to smoke a cigarette now and ponder the existance of god.
say something interesting, you who reads my ramblings.
I feel like this: