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sedona666

Milwaukee, WI

Member Since 2004

Followers 110 Following 105

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Tuesday Jan 15, 2008

Jan 15, 2008
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Okay... so here goes...

I am stuck in a moment that has lasted over a year now. Things are starting to come full circle and I have had some new awareness enter my realm of being which has been very good. Letting go. This is why I'm stuck, or rather inability of letting go. My whole life I have struggled with this concept. Now I must master it if I am ever to move foward. I know what specifically needs to be let go and I know why and furthermore, I understand why, yet I just can't seem to do it. I'm so tired of feeling this way and I want so much to be able to surrender to the universe and just be.

I know it boils down to fear. When it's all stripped down, I'm afraid to admit that my heart made a mistake because if I accept that then I'm not sure I'll ever trust it again. I know this is all a part of the learning process of life and this too shall pass, but I can't seem to get past this one. Maybe I'm focusing too much on the wrong thing, pushing too hard... it sure wouldn't be the first time. Maybe it just needs to come in like a wave.

In the past month or so the wisdom of the bear called to me during a reiki attunement. Never having had a connection with bears before I decided to look into it. The bear stands in his own power in a quiet and confident manner, a natural leader. The bear teaches that one must retreat into themselves to find the stillness and the truth. This all resonated very well with me as I am gathering up my inner strength so that I may once again stand in my place of personal power.

I have been asking the universe for help letting go, especially at the last full moon of 2007. I have been searching for the way to let go and trying to see what I must do or not do, to allow me to let go of that which does not serve me any longer. Last week the horse visited me randomly in several different situations during one day, enough to make me notice the 'coincidences'. So again, I looked into the teachings of the horse. The horse symbolizes freedom and the power that lies in that freedom. It challenges you to awaken your inner power and boldly move foward.

So it seems the universe has not only given me direction, but how to overcome the obstacles that are in my way. To bring forth my inner strength and power, I must allow myself to freely move and run with the wind. Not hold myself to past concepts and attachments that no longer serve my well being. So, this is the part where I clearly know where I need to focus my energy, yet I still find myself stuck.

All I can think of is to courageously live one day at a time and to light one candle, rather than curse the darkness.

That felt good. smile

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