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scutfarkus

New York

Member Since 2005

Followers 12 Following 32

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Wednesday Apr 12, 2006

Apr 11, 2006
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so whats been going on...

my friends are all going on trips... miami, london, bahamas, etc... im stuck here with my shitty job and an $80 paycheck for my tax return... woo hoo... 80bucks!

my ex gf may be pregnant... we continue to fight over everything... now its my fault that i didnt know hours later after i was out that id be tired and call her in advance to let her know i wasnt going to hang out with her... so its my fault im not psyhic... and that when she decided it was a good idea to jump in front of a train i had her come with me and leave and stay at my house so shed be safe and not upset or doing anything stupid... but thats me not caring...

my shitty luck continues... the courts fucked up with my fines/tickets/court dates etc... they claim i never showed up which i did and have an open case and a bench warrant... i was told to deal with it and see a judge immediatly... i said heres the money i owe for whatever i can pay now... LATER! and i walked out... so now im in even more trouble untill i decide to go back... if i decide to go back...

friends seem to be talking a lot of shit and turning a lot of backs... people are showing there true colors and im not liking what i see... its good though to spend a lot of time talking with one of my best friends tonight that i havent seen or even talked to in quite awhile... we had some of the best conversations ive had in a real long time... "honor isnt cheap and trust comes tough"

went to a mets game sunday... tons of people to make fun of... its probably one of the only reasons i go to anywhere with large amounts of people... they won in the bottom of the ninth... $2 seats, you cant beat that... $4.50 a hotdog... that sucked...

this isnt the worst but definetly the most stressful point in my entire life to date... and that added to that fact that i have some anger issues... not good... snapping at the wrong people... or just to extremes over stupid shit... some woman today was looking at a box of easter snicker filled plastic eggs and it said snickers really big on the box and there was nothing but them on the shelve she was looking on but felt she needed to constantly check each egg as she picked it up to see what it was and if it was in fact a snickers egg... i wanted to kick her teeth down her throat it made me so mad... yet if someone punched me in the face then i dont think id care... i get mad at all the wrong things... i got in a sorta yelling match with my father over money... for something i never cared about or hold high in my life as something i want, need, or care about, its been the cause of so much anger, frustration, and just plain trouble lately... right before i went to court and was still facing jail and trying to come up with money to pay off my bills i was still spending cash on my friends and family instead of myself... yet i never have any real money anymore to spend and i hate that... i want another job... a better job... and i need to stay outta trouble...

thursday im suppose to have band practice... well see how that goes... im sure the guitarist wont pick up his phone as he never does and then of course we wont have practice... fucking annoying...

i should be in bed cause i have work tomorrow for around 12hours or so... cant wait... fuck...

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