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scotyrock

Newport Beach, CA-Rancho Cucamonga, CA

Member Since 2005

Followers 65 Following 97

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Sunday Mar 05, 2006

Mar 5, 2006
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I've been feeling very unfulfilled lately. Like I contribute nothing to myself or humanity. Like all I do is make lots of money and that's it. I feel like I contribute nothing. I no longer have a great love to live for, she was taken from me a little over a year ago. So I feel lost, like I'm just a waste of space.

I have been contemplating re-enlisting, but that was definitely a love/hate relationship. But I at least felt like I had a purpose, even if it was just doing everything I could to bring all my friends home and alive with me. Screw the government and their agenda, my agenda was to always protect the men I loved that are closer than brothers. A few of them have died in Iraq and I almost blame myself for their deaths. Like if I had been there I could have made a difference. I know that isn't true, but I still feel that way.

Does anyone else ever feel this lack of purpose?

The feeling like you are not using the skills and training that you have, like it's just going to waste?

More Blogs

  • 08.21.07
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    Tuesday Aug 21, 2007

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    Tuesday Aug 07, 2007

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  • 08.07.07
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    Tuesday Aug 07, 2007

    So, I haven't updated in about 2 months. I've been overseas for a mon…
  • 06.18.07
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    Tuesday Jun 19, 2007

    Okay, I had a very weird thing happen. A girl called me at 4:30am tod…
  • 03.21.07
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    Wednesday Mar 21, 2007

    Got a new partment downtown, now I can walk to all the bars and stumb…
  • 03.15.07
    0

    Thursday Mar 15, 2007

    Heading to VA Beach for the weekend to visit some old military teamma…
  • 02.15.07
    0

    Thursday Feb 15, 2007

    Okay, I got to do like the coolest thing today! I got to help my b…
  • 02.05.07
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    Monday Feb 05, 2007

    I didn't just pretend to like the Vegan food...I was the only boy in …
  • 12.31.06
    1

    Sunday Dec 31, 2006

    Happy New Year!!
  • 12.28.06
    1

    Thursday Dec 28, 2006

    Only an hour and fourty five minutes until my B-Day!!!! Who's comi…

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