scorpiogray

The first real snow I've seen here in Spokane. It looks pretty nice outside but I guarantee you its nothing like lake effect snow back in Michigan. I did want to be in a place where it didn't really snow, but standing on my little apartment deck looking around it is very pretty when I don't have to be out driving in it and cleaning my car off every time I go into a store. I've never really done any winter activities other than sledding and since I make less than minimum wage per hour, it doesn't look like I'm going to be learning this year either.

Things have been kind rough for me since I've moved out here. I have no family and no real friends at this moment. I spent Thanksgiving alone and it looks like that will be the case for Christmas as well. I think though it might be good for me to be alone, maybe make me appreciate my family a little more. Anyways, I do get to go back in Jan. so that is cool. I think this needs to be a year of self reflection and really taking a good look at what I want and where I want to be, and hopefully move beyond some of the things I am still holding onto from my past.

On that note, this is a poem I wrote one night as I was thinking about my last relationship and realized that I never really addressed this issue, so enjoy it in its melancholy

Meant to Be

I thought I would pretend awhile,
That you and I were meant to be
I dreamt of a house in the woods
A safe place for us to be

I saw my life with you
And the happiness it would bring
A warm feeling filled me up
Before the alarm woke me up

The reality took awhile
To set in as sleep left my eyes
You were no longer there
My bed far too big and bare

I thought I would pretend again
That everything in my life was fine
I dreamt of that house again
But awake this time

It didnt last, and now I see
What was mine is gone,
And we were never meant to be