scoffee

its weird how you forget about that one event that changes your life. i remember it now. i don't know why i've been thinking about her so much. another girl i seemed to fall in love with so long ago. i guess it was 2005 ish. i met here on a retreat i was helping out with. back when i was all religious. she asked me to go to germany with her for a week. and for some reason i just said no. well i had many reasons. mostly because i was living with my ex girlfriend. we werent even together. paying rent on our shitty house. i cant believe i sad no. i compare it to the scene in hitchhikers guide to the galaxy. when trisha asks arthur to go to madagascar. he wants to so bad but he just says no and misses a great opportunity. but i never got a second chance like he did in the movie. after that i lived my life so differently. i never say no anymore. well yeah i do sometimes. i'm not stupid. but i never want to miss out on an opportunity. but of course an opportunity like that never came up again. it seems like it had something to do with me moving with out me knowing it. i dunno i'll probably never see her again. she lives in spain now. i wonder where i would be if i went with her. oh well i believe everything happens (or doesnt happen) for a reason.


well my brother, sis in law and my neice are all going to the olympics. i'm gonna be here by myself. woo! i got the place to my self. i'd throw a party if i knew anyone to invite.