WARNING THIS IS MY LAST JOURNAL UPDATE!!
***3 strikes and your out... my credit card could not be processed still. So I guess that will be it for me until I can sort out this problem with my credit card. However I fear that I may be maxed out after all and with my rental of a PA and speaker set at Lakeshore music I fear I may be in serious trouble right now. But my credit rating is still maintained at perfect.
I love you all and hope that you will keep in touch with me. My account will be open until the website shuts me down.**
If anyone ever said being in a band was easy they are fucking idiots.
but wait you wanna talk about idiots... some of the guys in the band want to slap away a helping hand, cuz it proves absolutley nothing to say fuck you to a small fan base that we are developing and a small production company that wants to help us out.
No you are not looking at things in the real world you idiot.. you are burning a fucking bridge that we will never get back and you are telling our small fan base to fuck off because for whatever reason you think YOU are better than them. I don't.... we have done nothing to prove ourselves beyond what we have right now.
Ok let me explain. Remember when I said that we had two shows this weekend. Well to me they were pretty good successes.
The first show was at a YMCA youth center. We were playing on the floor (which pissed off some band members) and our drummer had to work the sound set up (which pissed him off too) however we had a great crowd and a great pressence. Kids were almost killing eachother in our mosh pit (not that I condone that.. I try to stay out of pits really) and people were telling us "oh c'mon you gotta play one more song" We had a really shitty ending because we had to fill time and we filled it by playing a really long unrehearsed song that I had to freestyle my lyrics on. So our ending sucked and some of the guys in the band were pissed that we didn't get a throng of these kids comming up to us to shake our hands and tell us how great we are. What the fuck is that. I was happy to have a great crowd and have a fun time playing.
The second show was a bar with a good stage and moderatly good sound set up. We had some technical difficulties after our first song but another band bailed us out and we were off to the races. Another great crowd and good show and all that. Then after we go to pizza pizza and our drummer starts talking about how shittty everything is and how he doesn't want to work with this company that is giving us all these shows. Im bitting my tounge because I wanted to snap up and yell at him for being arrogant but you can't yell at this guy you can't start an argument with him you can't tell him you didn't like something he did because with all his bi-polar mental conditions he'll freak out and probably kill you or in my case he would mangle my face if I started to yell at him or tell him something he didn't want to hear. Hes like a little child sometimes. This guy needs to grow the fuck up.
Im considering walking because these attitudes will always sabotage us because there is nothing at our level right now with the kind of standards that our drummer has and wants and apparently demands or else he isn't playing. I don't know what to do.. I can't believe its comming to this because I don't think I'll be able to find another band to play in that I'll enjoy or even one to play in at all.
When a hand comes out of nowhere to offer you help you don't just slap it away and spit in its face, especially when no other hand to help you will come along..ever.
thats all for now
music: Still got us in my head
mood: Im so confused and angry and frustrated right now.
and to think I wanted to talk about the good news that Im talking to that girl again and that shes been there every night to hear about the shows and to hear my good and bad news and for me to listen to her life and how its going and that we even had a pretty flirty discussion the one night we finally started talking again. and we have a "date" for new years. See she called it that even though she has a boyfriend but she was sarcastic or fillipant about it. It was like "Okay I can't wait till new years now so I can see you again" "Its a date" she replies. She threw the wink face at me when I mentioned I was changing my clothes too... is that a good sign. God I wish I had the balls to tell her how I feel about her and how much I want to kiss her all night and to hold her in my arms and feel her near me. le sigh.
Hey look at that I did tell you after all.
***3 strikes and your out... my credit card could not be processed still. So I guess that will be it for me until I can sort out this problem with my credit card. However I fear that I may be maxed out after all and with my rental of a PA and speaker set at Lakeshore music I fear I may be in serious trouble right now. But my credit rating is still maintained at perfect.
I love you all and hope that you will keep in touch with me. My account will be open until the website shuts me down.**
If anyone ever said being in a band was easy they are fucking idiots.
but wait you wanna talk about idiots... some of the guys in the band want to slap away a helping hand, cuz it proves absolutley nothing to say fuck you to a small fan base that we are developing and a small production company that wants to help us out.
No you are not looking at things in the real world you idiot.. you are burning a fucking bridge that we will never get back and you are telling our small fan base to fuck off because for whatever reason you think YOU are better than them. I don't.... we have done nothing to prove ourselves beyond what we have right now.
Ok let me explain. Remember when I said that we had two shows this weekend. Well to me they were pretty good successes.
The first show was at a YMCA youth center. We were playing on the floor (which pissed off some band members) and our drummer had to work the sound set up (which pissed him off too) however we had a great crowd and a great pressence. Kids were almost killing eachother in our mosh pit (not that I condone that.. I try to stay out of pits really) and people were telling us "oh c'mon you gotta play one more song" We had a really shitty ending because we had to fill time and we filled it by playing a really long unrehearsed song that I had to freestyle my lyrics on. So our ending sucked and some of the guys in the band were pissed that we didn't get a throng of these kids comming up to us to shake our hands and tell us how great we are. What the fuck is that. I was happy to have a great crowd and have a fun time playing.
The second show was a bar with a good stage and moderatly good sound set up. We had some technical difficulties after our first song but another band bailed us out and we were off to the races. Another great crowd and good show and all that. Then after we go to pizza pizza and our drummer starts talking about how shittty everything is and how he doesn't want to work with this company that is giving us all these shows. Im bitting my tounge because I wanted to snap up and yell at him for being arrogant but you can't yell at this guy you can't start an argument with him you can't tell him you didn't like something he did because with all his bi-polar mental conditions he'll freak out and probably kill you or in my case he would mangle my face if I started to yell at him or tell him something he didn't want to hear. Hes like a little child sometimes. This guy needs to grow the fuck up.
Im considering walking because these attitudes will always sabotage us because there is nothing at our level right now with the kind of standards that our drummer has and wants and apparently demands or else he isn't playing. I don't know what to do.. I can't believe its comming to this because I don't think I'll be able to find another band to play in that I'll enjoy or even one to play in at all.
When a hand comes out of nowhere to offer you help you don't just slap it away and spit in its face, especially when no other hand to help you will come along..ever.
thats all for now
music: Still got us in my head
mood: Im so confused and angry and frustrated right now.
and to think I wanted to talk about the good news that Im talking to that girl again and that shes been there every night to hear about the shows and to hear my good and bad news and for me to listen to her life and how its going and that we even had a pretty flirty discussion the one night we finally started talking again. and we have a "date" for new years. See she called it that even though she has a boyfriend but she was sarcastic or fillipant about it. It was like "Okay I can't wait till new years now so I can see you again" "Its a date" she replies. She threw the wink face at me when I mentioned I was changing my clothes too... is that a good sign. God I wish I had the balls to tell her how I feel about her and how much I want to kiss her all night and to hold her in my arms and feel her near me. le sigh.
Hey look at that I did tell you after all.
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~Gits