scatmonkey

Just keep saying that. A mantra is good. When the house is burning down, the paddy wagon is full of drunken friends, and the news crew is shining a spotlight in your face asking you, "Did Mike Tyson ever touch you," you'll be able to say over and over, "I'm way too much of a spaz for this." They'll understand.

Wound so tight you're the swiss watch of scatmonkeys. I understand. I recommend turkey and wine. Nothing chills me out better than lots of turkey and wine. That's actually pretty sad.

A cattle prod has approximately the same voltage of an electric fence. Enough to startle and cause a little pain, but do no real damage. Now, if you held the cattle prod on someone for a significant length of time, it'd probably burn the skin a bit. But then if you really lost control with your sand-filled rubber hoses you'd probably do some damage, too. Keeping friends in line is so tedious, is it not?