scarletbegonias

Well...so much for my dog doing well, but now it's not his eyes. He was diagnosed about a week and a half ago with Lymphoma which is an incurable form of cancer. The only thing they can do is give him chemo for 6 months to extend is life 8-12 months total (at great financial expense of course) and although they said that dog's tolerate the chemo well (better than people) I gave him a first treatment and he was completely sick all week. So, I had to make the decision about what I was going to do, and although, I love my dog so much, and I can't imagine life without him, and he's still so young, I couldn't justify putting him through treatments that would make him sick just to extend is life a few months. Quality rather than Quantity right? It was a really hard decision to make to just let him go. He'll be gone within a couple of months and I'm just going to do what I can to make his life the most comfortable and normal until it's time. Not looking forward to that moment either. It just sucks! After everything we've both been through and now this. For the first week I was crying buckets, but now I'm starting to accept it, as difficult as it is. As a dog person, I'll probably have to go through similar things with dogs throughout my life, and I have lost family pets before, but this is the first dog that is mine, that I raised and trained and that I watched is birth, and now I will have to watch his death...it's such a difficult time.

But, a friend did read me something about Pluto being in retrograde which has to do with death and re-birth and how we are all so fearful of death and we try to run away from it and do whatever we can to avoid it at all costs instead of accepting it as a part of life and facing it. I guess this is my way of facing it to a certain extent, and I guess it's what I think is most kind to do right now for my dog, no matter how much it hurts me.