It's Christmas Eve.
I would call this any other day, other than it has a title that lots of people find meaning in (that I really don't, truthfully) and that I'm drunk and alone. I got into a fight today.
I don't think it constitutes as a fight so much as a one ended conversation where I did very little talking and lots of thinking. The end result was that I was alone at my house, with lots of intent to write and little to show for it, other than maybe a refilled glass, an empty bottle, and a blinking cursor.
It keeps blinking at me, ticking like a turn signal for a road I missed a long, long, long time ago. I'm still driving down the same one-shot, going slower than I want, and ending up nowhere, not for my lack of speed, but my lack of ability to put my foot on the fucking gas.
As I type this, I wonder how many other aspiring (lame) writers, have made the same reference to their less than eventful lives, and the urge to go back and erase everything my fingers managed is tempting.
Sheryl Crow is talking to me. She's sort of my guilty pleasure. She's got this track called Crash and Burn that always eithers breaks me or pushes me forward. Good melody. Stirking lyrics. She's a lot braver than I am. She says things that I'm usually too scared to say. She's too honest with herself. It makes me envy her.
"Crash And Burn"
I watched the sun come up on Portland
I waved goodbye to all my friends
I packed my car and headed to LA
I gave away all my loose ends
Somebody said you gotta get away
To wanna go back home again
I left my universe standing there
Holding the hand of my best friend
And it's laughter that I feel when I think of you
It's one more dusty rose about to turn
I'll see you when I reach New Mexico
If I'm in the mood to crash and burn
I wrote a letter that I never mailed
I rehearsed a dialogue in my head
In case you ever wanted to track me down
I'll take my cell phone to bed
And it's laughter that I hear when I close my eyes
And it's one more punchline I forgot to learn
I call you up when my bottle's dry
I'm on my way to crash and burn
Antigone laid across the road
And let a mack truck leave her there for dead
Just because her lover split the scene
Well love might be great but why lose your head
Well, it's laughter that comes up when I cry for you
And my heart may break again before it learns
And I might be stupid enough to want to fall again
Cause I've gotten use to the crash and burn
I say I've gotten use to the crash and burn
Crash and burn
I would call this any other day, other than it has a title that lots of people find meaning in (that I really don't, truthfully) and that I'm drunk and alone. I got into a fight today.
I don't think it constitutes as a fight so much as a one ended conversation where I did very little talking and lots of thinking. The end result was that I was alone at my house, with lots of intent to write and little to show for it, other than maybe a refilled glass, an empty bottle, and a blinking cursor.
It keeps blinking at me, ticking like a turn signal for a road I missed a long, long, long time ago. I'm still driving down the same one-shot, going slower than I want, and ending up nowhere, not for my lack of speed, but my lack of ability to put my foot on the fucking gas.
As I type this, I wonder how many other aspiring (lame) writers, have made the same reference to their less than eventful lives, and the urge to go back and erase everything my fingers managed is tempting.
Sheryl Crow is talking to me. She's sort of my guilty pleasure. She's got this track called Crash and Burn that always eithers breaks me or pushes me forward. Good melody. Stirking lyrics. She's a lot braver than I am. She says things that I'm usually too scared to say. She's too honest with herself. It makes me envy her.
"Crash And Burn"
I watched the sun come up on Portland
I waved goodbye to all my friends
I packed my car and headed to LA
I gave away all my loose ends
Somebody said you gotta get away
To wanna go back home again
I left my universe standing there
Holding the hand of my best friend
And it's laughter that I feel when I think of you
It's one more dusty rose about to turn
I'll see you when I reach New Mexico
If I'm in the mood to crash and burn
I wrote a letter that I never mailed
I rehearsed a dialogue in my head
In case you ever wanted to track me down
I'll take my cell phone to bed
And it's laughter that I hear when I close my eyes
And it's one more punchline I forgot to learn
I call you up when my bottle's dry
I'm on my way to crash and burn
Antigone laid across the road
And let a mack truck leave her there for dead
Just because her lover split the scene
Well love might be great but why lose your head
Well, it's laughter that comes up when I cry for you
And my heart may break again before it learns
And I might be stupid enough to want to fall again
Cause I've gotten use to the crash and burn
I say I've gotten use to the crash and burn
Crash and burn