satanis7

Why can't life be like a beer commercial from the early 90's?

I mean, I keep opening a bud light and expecting to be transported to a place where there are bombshells with gigantic jugs waiting to prance on my dick like it's the meaning of life. Instead, I just get drunk.

I mean, being drunk is cool and all, but it's nowhere near as cool without sex.

Fuck it. Maybe I ought to just bust into the porn industry again. I mean, getting paid to bang can't be that bad, right?