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sassylass

Canada

Member Since 2004

Followers 15 Following 15

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Monday Oct 18, 2004

Oct 18, 2004
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so tomorrows ei day...

i just got a bill for my gas saying i'm pretty much up to 100$ owing to them and that i need to pay off the past due amount or i may be cut off.
hm about 3 months behind in all my bills. phone ,hydro,gas.
so thats about 300$ more or less for all of those. and then i'm 3 months behind in rent.i usually pay my landlord $250 a cheque.

so tomorrow i get $380 and have to find a way to passify everyone,and still have some money for cat food/litter
and food for 2 weeks...god help me!

i wish that guy at trefford would get back from his holiday already , let me know about the job..blah..as fri.. i heard that the place i was working at has run into some problems with the contract that i'm paid to do and there call back date has moved back to jan..and even thats no longer a for sure thing for me to be expecting to got back to work there even then.

so i don't know if i should give my landlord a little less cash and pay a little more to bills?or what to do..arggghhh...i feel like i'm already pushed that as far as i should/can.

i guess i should really try and find a roomate for my other room here.but this place is pretty small and i go crazy living with anyone else but boyfriends.

damn, i wish sg had at least wanted one set from me..it would have payed off my over due bills and kept me just above the line.in fact i was feeling pretty damn confident in those pictures. so it was a lameass blow to me to find they didn't think they were up to there standards..blah.and i was also really kinda depending on that extra cash..oh well that will teach me..never count your eggs before they hatch bok

when will i grow up and learn to become more responsible with my money? i never plan for times like these..so end up digging a huge hole for myself..i guess it's not really all my fault as my ex decided to move out on me without really too much notice..tho i'm better off without him emotionally ...but fuck it totally screwed me up finacially.

i just want it all to end and to get back on my feet again..i hate the stress of finding a bill in my mailbox.

actually this whole year has kinda blown for me..started off getting dumped,..found out he was bi-polar..,then he came back and then left again after a month or less!..then my b-day sucked.even my parents who usually send me a card with a cheque in it every year didn't even send me a card this year...i got laid-off with a days notice...i spent 2 months working my ass off and spending money on props and sets and staying up it 4am editing pictures and out of 6 sets not one got accepted.i really think it's time for a turn for the better.....i'm starting to feel like not even fighting to stay above some days...probably the smart thing would be to cancell my internet and phone and save money that way...but god if i loose that lifeline to my friends that live out east and contact with just having someone to talk to i'll be even more depressed...

i don't really want to start looking for another job till i hear from trafford as i was pretty positive that they want me to work there..but then my assumptions seem to be totally wrong lately so god help me if i fucked that up by asking them if i could start in dec.....as i also was planning on a holiday with my money in nov,...hahah a i guess i really did dig my own hole here...shit.

i know i sound all fucked up and everything..but i don't really need any words of encouragement. i'm just using this to vent..so i don't walk around too full of shit.i know people care about me and hope that things will work themselves out..and i'm sure they will ..it's just being at the rock and a hard place thats hard to get past..so thanks to everyone who reads this.. kiss

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