As if things weren't already looking up, I had this dream lastnight.. and Brandon was in it. That's as much as I remember about it at all. He was there.
Tonight, I was hanging out with Kristina, and I got two voice mails from him. "You might wanna call me." "I'd like to talk to you."
It's not hard to ignore him, because I've been doing it since we broke up. I deleted his phone number off of my phone, and yes I still have his hoodie. But I honestly DONT want it.
Earlier than all of this happening, I decided to talk to my dad about potentially going to Aveda. I explained to him that it would require moving to a bigger city. To say the least, it didn't go well. No discussion was had. Period. His responce was simply the following: "go! get out! " with a lot of arm movements. As if he didn't care that I wanted to do something more with myself than sit around a shit hole town and have shit jobs for the rest of my life. If I'm going to be living in this skin, I want to at least do something I enjoy, as opposed to something I hate. Totally not what I'm about at all.
And as it currently stands, I've got nothing better to think about, so this'll be on my mind till I at least motivate to apply to other places for a bit of cash.
I feel completely helpless knowing that my dad doesn't want me to do this. I feel like I've lost all of the help I've ever had in this world. He's always been there, and has always been supportive of me. I don't see why he isn't now.
EDIT---
And then he comes home, not even saying a single word to me. I'm sitting here exhausted cause I vaccumed, swept, and even washed some of the floors in the house for approximately 2 1/2 hours. He starts to throw away two of my shirts, that are hanging out by the sewing machine.. waiting for a hem. I ask "what are you doing?" and he goes.. "throwing things away.. you throw away my body spray in the bathroom all of the time." Which usually includes 10,000 bottles of body spray that he never uses. Spectacular. I'm not looking to pick a fight, so maybe If I go and hideout in my room he'll dissapear.
Tonight, I was hanging out with Kristina, and I got two voice mails from him. "You might wanna call me." "I'd like to talk to you."
It's not hard to ignore him, because I've been doing it since we broke up. I deleted his phone number off of my phone, and yes I still have his hoodie. But I honestly DONT want it.
Earlier than all of this happening, I decided to talk to my dad about potentially going to Aveda. I explained to him that it would require moving to a bigger city. To say the least, it didn't go well. No discussion was had. Period. His responce was simply the following: "go! get out! " with a lot of arm movements. As if he didn't care that I wanted to do something more with myself than sit around a shit hole town and have shit jobs for the rest of my life. If I'm going to be living in this skin, I want to at least do something I enjoy, as opposed to something I hate. Totally not what I'm about at all.
And as it currently stands, I've got nothing better to think about, so this'll be on my mind till I at least motivate to apply to other places for a bit of cash.
I feel completely helpless knowing that my dad doesn't want me to do this. I feel like I've lost all of the help I've ever had in this world. He's always been there, and has always been supportive of me. I don't see why he isn't now.
EDIT---
And then he comes home, not even saying a single word to me. I'm sitting here exhausted cause I vaccumed, swept, and even washed some of the floors in the house for approximately 2 1/2 hours. He starts to throw away two of my shirts, that are hanging out by the sewing machine.. waiting for a hem. I ask "what are you doing?" and he goes.. "throwing things away.. you throw away my body spray in the bathroom all of the time." Which usually includes 10,000 bottles of body spray that he never uses. Spectacular. I'm not looking to pick a fight, so maybe If I go and hideout in my room he'll dissapear.
It makes me sad when parents make their kids feel blue