my mother and i have never had a smooth relationship. she is a single mom and i am an only child. i spent a lot of time in childcare, or living with family, or a boyfriend until i moved out entirely at 18. i rarely lived with her. i know how difficult it is for a single parent. my mother did not want to be a parent, and resented me. as her adult child i still struggle with my relationship with her, trying to accept her for who she is without expecting change. she has lived her life, on her own terms, and mostly alone. except for the time i spent living with her, she has been alone by choice for her whole life. i admire the force of her will, and that on a secretary's salary she owns her own home, had bought a second, and raised me. she married my father briefly, and they quickly divorced. she didn't get much child support. she does not share much of her life with me, and i wish she would. i know nothing of my family history. i do know she has had many of the quintessential experiences of women, facing domestic abuse,breast cancer, being left to raise a child she did not want. such a strong woman, i wish we could be friends, but sadly, at 34 years of age, i realize we never will. i will share with you three lessons she taught me,
1) always hover when peeing in a public toilet, never touch the seat.
2) never lend money to a friend. give it to them, but don't expect to be repaid.
and finally,
3) by cautionary example, she has taught me to value my relationships with others. maybe i value my family and friends as much as i do because of the loneliness of my childhood. so please, treat the people in your life like the treasures they are.
1) always hover when peeing in a public toilet, never touch the seat.
2) never lend money to a friend. give it to them, but don't expect to be repaid.
and finally,
3) by cautionary example, she has taught me to value my relationships with others. maybe i value my family and friends as much as i do because of the loneliness of my childhood. so please, treat the people in your life like the treasures they are.
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2.) i've always gone by the "don't give what you can't afford to lose" motto.
III.) i need to work on that third one.