sambaloco

its looking like we are getting closer to break up.
I'm realizing that I don't want to be with someone who is so negative all the time.

I play the positive. She the negative.

I want to be energized. The current will only flow if positive meets positive.
I hear her as she hears her mother
not as she wishes she
heard her mother

nag nag nag
the world hates me
i hate people
negative

I think " why am I..
here?"
"why, do i love her?"
I'm having a hard time remembering
where all the bliss trickled off to
did it trickle and leak
slowly finding its way
sliding down across the counter top and onto
the floor
is it forming a heart shaped pool
on the floor?

we talk about the future but I can't imagine anymore
she can barely function on a daily level
how could she possibly take care of
a dog?
children?
and would she ever be willing to see my friends?
she convienently is always too busy to see / meet my friends now.

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.................. .....................


i forgot that writing in movement is
freeing
i miss that
its been years since i actually wrote how...
i felt...
like this.
freeverse