samanthakayne

'so the seven deadly sins have got their hooks in me.
it's not easy being good
and i'm not what i appear to be.
i'm easily distracted by violence, pornography.
i don't do the things i should.
it's not easy being good
but i'm gonna fly like an angel.
i'm gonna act like an angel.
i'm gonna sing like an angel.
i don't care anymore.'

i'm tired.

tired of bein bigger than life.

tired of feelin so desperately unsexy.

tired of knowing that even if i did manage to feel it, it would be just me.

tired of being too pregnant to even masturbate properly.

tired of ceding my husband to porn for all of the above mentioned reasons.

tired of being 43 weeks pregnant with a 33 week baby.

tired of the heat.

tired of never being comfortable.

tired of feeling so incredibly unlike myself.

tired of talking the voices in my head out of being psycho for one more time.

tired of begrudging the daughter i already love more than life itself another couple of weeks.

tired of getting out of breath going up the stairs in my own house.

tired of bitching about shit - i'm not a complainer, goddammit.