sairouse

I think we can all forgive an infidelity at some point, however that doesn't equate to forgetting and not having appropriate consequences.  I'm a firm believer in taking responsibility for your choices, and accepting the consequences there after, good or bad.  Personally, I have enough respect for myself to have clearly defined boundaries of what is, and is not, acceptable in a relationship/monogamous commitment.  Infidelity for me is not acceptable, and the appropriate consequence is to end it and move on.  The reason being, the appropriate consequence needs to be painful enough to allow the person to learn from it.  If they can simply say they are sorry and are allowed to remain in good standing with you, then what is the lesson? And by "good standing", I mean - they betray you and you still stay with them - then they learn that they can cheat and you will stay.  They will simply just say it again next time.  And if you had drawn the "line in the sand" by saying that it isn't going to be acceptable for you, and then you don't follow through, you appear to have low integrity.  You gave them a shot, and they didn't respect it.  They don't deserve you.  Even if they swear up and down that it was only once and will never happen again, then agree... it will never happen again, with you.  And they can practice what they preach with the next person.  Who knows, maybe you just saved someone else from having to get cheated on by this person who cheated on you, and lost.

No unfortunately once the trust is broken there is no getting it back