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saintgomi

Member Since 2002

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Thursday Oct 03, 2002

Oct 3, 2002
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When Nicholas saw her he fell in love, and when he fell in love his heart stopped. She was Death and just as the Qabbalists had predicted, Death was so beautiful that his soul was pulled from his body through his eyes.

He entered Death through her eyes and was made beautiful, too. He fell down through her dream flesh, running his tongue down the inside of her belly as he went, spiraling around her bones like a fireman's pole, in love with Death and in love with himself inside her. As he fell, he saw all the beauty and stupidity of his tiny life, and none of it mattered. He saw Earth and the pinwheeling galaxies fizzle and burn out, and none of it mattered. He saw God and the incandescent angels and Lucifer's grumbling hordes, and none of it mattered. The inside of Death's perfect skin was inscribed with every secret sign, unsolvable mathematical equation and work of art conceived in the mind of humanity, and none of it mattered. The fall itself was the thing. He wondered if this love, this enrapturement, was the sudden Enlightenment the Buddhists talked about. He realized that the fact he was wondering about it meant it probably wasn't Enlightenment at all, but that didn't matter either. He simply fell and felt Death pass through him until he finally dropped down through the soles of her feet into a vast Nothingness.

It was a very crowded Nothingness. He was jostled on all sides by other entities, many of whom were tense, poised, waiting for something. Nicholas wanted to ask Death about this, but she just kissed him lightly on the lips and disappeared, leaving Nicholas in the Nothingness. It began to vibrate and hum and grow hot. Suddenly the Nothingness made sense.

He was a subatomic particle, in a sea of other subatomic particles. Trillions of them. They were vibrating more violently with each passing second, threatening to rip themselves apart. As some of the particles in the center of the Nothingness exploded, Nicholas wanted to be back with beautiful Death. That's when Nicholas knew he would see Death again--at the end of this new Big Bang. He would be with Death when this new universe he was helping to form collapsed in on itself or drifted so thin that it returned to Nothingness. It might take a while, but Nicholas was excited at the idea of creating new life, new planets and stars. Besides, he thought as his subatomic self exploded into new light, what's a few billion years when you're in love?
krazmo:
Wow. *shudder*
Oct 5, 2002

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