right.
torn between the desires to destroy and express (in which even the former is a case of the latter).
i was all like: "this is ultimately your decision. now you know where i stand... but i can't fix things inside your head. only you can do that."
she's a psychology student, so i'm not sure if that helped or not.
i really can't stand this nauseating burn, this frustrating sense of... of... of, well, helplessness, i suppose.
i want so much to call her up. to see her. to grab her by the shoulders and shake some her. to cry, "don't be a fool!"
this is why i've been opting out for so long.
and it's only been a week with her. technically a week and a half.
spend a day apart and see what happens?!
but it's like i said at the start: right.
right, as in true. as in just.
just.
just okay. just how it is.
just be calm. just be cool.
just just just.
i feel like i'm 17 again... and i just don't know...
"you're strong," she said at one point as we sat on a pier on the south bank. "i know that i won't break you either way. i know that you'll survive."
it doesn't bode too well folks. which is a shame.
i really like this one.
offer a prayer for me.
send a little thought for the girl who's such a welcome pain in the arse.
a long time ago i wrote a tale about a girl with a cursed heart.
she asked me to tell her a story onw night, as she lay in my arms, drifting alowly away from the world... so i told her that story. i told her about "song-field" and the curse that she bore.
"do you think someone's heart can really be cursed?" she asked me afterwards.
"no."
was i lying?
i'm trying to be all addie about this.
really i am.
all cool and encompassing and with faith in the universe...
i'm trying. i really am.
(as my uncle would say: yes, you're very trying.)
but what i really hate is that there is now nothing that i can do.
i feel like i want to go and get absolutely hammered.
but that won't help at all...
so i'm going to treck out to a capoeira class in camden,
then come home, maybe smoke a little spliff, maybe not,
try to sleep,
and get up early for uni tomorrow.
life, as they say, goes on.
they say many things.
i hate them.
torn between the desires to destroy and express (in which even the former is a case of the latter).
i was all like: "this is ultimately your decision. now you know where i stand... but i can't fix things inside your head. only you can do that."
she's a psychology student, so i'm not sure if that helped or not.
i really can't stand this nauseating burn, this frustrating sense of... of... of, well, helplessness, i suppose.
i want so much to call her up. to see her. to grab her by the shoulders and shake some her. to cry, "don't be a fool!"
this is why i've been opting out for so long.
and it's only been a week with her. technically a week and a half.
spend a day apart and see what happens?!
but it's like i said at the start: right.
right, as in true. as in just.
just.
just okay. just how it is.
just be calm. just be cool.
just just just.
i feel like i'm 17 again... and i just don't know...
"you're strong," she said at one point as we sat on a pier on the south bank. "i know that i won't break you either way. i know that you'll survive."
it doesn't bode too well folks. which is a shame.
i really like this one.
offer a prayer for me.
send a little thought for the girl who's such a welcome pain in the arse.
a long time ago i wrote a tale about a girl with a cursed heart.
she asked me to tell her a story onw night, as she lay in my arms, drifting alowly away from the world... so i told her that story. i told her about "song-field" and the curse that she bore.
"do you think someone's heart can really be cursed?" she asked me afterwards.
"no."
was i lying?
i'm trying to be all addie about this.
really i am.
all cool and encompassing and with faith in the universe...
i'm trying. i really am.
(as my uncle would say: yes, you're very trying.)
but what i really hate is that there is now nothing that i can do.
i feel like i want to go and get absolutely hammered.
but that won't help at all...
so i'm going to treck out to a capoeira class in camden,
then come home, maybe smoke a little spliff, maybe not,
try to sleep,
and get up early for uni tomorrow.
life, as they say, goes on.
they say many things.
i hate them.
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
i dont think i will put it off for a whole year
i do however reserve the right to take another vacation in a year
no, it cant rain all the time. however, it can apparently rain all the times that im not sleeping or at work
and you are fishing in London, i am fisihing in a small town in the bible belt. Our fish seem to have caught some disease and are all rotten. If i were fishing there im quite certain there are many fish id like to taste