sable1066

It has been a little while since I have written anything here with substance. I have never been a person who has a hard time dealing with emotional issues or being able to tell someone how I really feel, but I am having a serious should I/should I not problem. After my ex wanted to break things off I thought that I had let the feelings of betrayal and anger go, I guess that I was a bit more hurt than I would have liked to admit. I guess I could have continued in blissful ignorance if she had not reappeared out of the blue, telling me how sorry and wrong she was. The first thought in my mind was 'so, the other pasture hasd too much crap for your taste did it?', what I said was I don't know if I still trust you enough to do this again. I do love the woman, but I have to ask myself if I can really forgive. The saying goes that I will forgive but never forget, but is that not the same as saying that you willl never forgive? How do you truly trust someone again who ripped out your heart and smoked it in a crack pipe? After many of my life's experiences it is hard for me to trust, even harder to totally open up to another person. How do you recover that? Life, she is a bitch sometimes.