sabine

today was really exhausting. i woke up feeling really sick but i still had to drive my friend around all day helping him pick out an apartment. well, townhouse, whatever. at least it's narrowed down to two...finally. but now i'm about ready to sleep. we talked a lot today, mainly on the way back to his place which is an hour and a half away (he's moving to my town which will be much nicer, not having to make such a drive to see him). we talked to keep each other awake. we talked about politics and the economy. two of my least favorite subjects, but two that i do enjoy arguing with him about. and more interestingly we talked about christmas and family traditions and shared some drunken relative stories which are always amusing. some things that seemed so horrible at the time are really funny now...
another thing got my thinking the other night, on a totally different subject. i was at a gathering with a bunch of friends. it was our typical weekend gathering where as the night winds down half the party moves into the living room just lounging around talking with a movie on in the background which everyone ignores. the movie happened to be clerks and i hadn't been paying attention at all but suddenly i happen to catch the line where what'shisname points out to dante that he's now had sex with someone who's dead. without much thought (b/c with much thought i would've remembered how uncomfortable most people are with the subject of death) i said to everyone "wow...someone i've had sex with is dead too.." heh and of course no one knew what to say. so finally someone cracked a necrophilia joke and we laughed half heartedly. but yeah...not just someone i've slept with, but the only person i've completely and truly been in love with. and a silly comment from a movie somehow made it seem even more profound. it's like realizing a huge chunk of what your life was is now just a memory. or maybe i'm just really tired and trying to philosophize way too much...
something good will occur soon though. i'll be going home for christmas. i'll be spending time with my sister. hell, i'm even excited to see my extended family. i'll see friends i havent seen in too. and have some good times. and from there to amsterdam with some of these friends.
i'm going to be busy for a while but i'll try to post again when i can (i couldnt miss out on new girl week of course.)