rylie

what do you do when you know it's wrong?

it's overwhelmingly right.

It's so wrong.

It's so right.

Theres the word conflicted. it's a great word, but it's nowhere near where I am.

When you've found someone who understands you completely, and you enderstand them, but there are... obsticles to say the least...

I don't know how I'm meant to continue.

I'm relatively sure that...
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t's been an odd weekend.

emotionally drained.

I am unthawed,
I am waiting for the snow to melt and for the sun to reveal these shapes and thoughts for what they really are.
I am waiting for honesty to melt away and reveal the lies we tell ourselves.
I am wanting.
I am not better for having said no.
I am not despairaging against myself...
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It's 5:13am

I just got home.

I spent the last 2 hours very delightfully walking the minneapolis railways with a co-worker of minne who is blossoming into quite the fine friend.

now at 5am I have three missed calls, from 3:55am, 3:55am and 3:57am from a good friend, and a message that if I don't answer the next time she calls, I'm getting hell.

What...
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for the sake of continuity

I will post a new blarg.

Hermitsville is holding up.

Clipped kitty's nails.

As a result I am covered in scratches.

Weekend is over with very little accomplished. did some dishes, spent some money. I have a new stuffed elephant. His name is Germaine. Spelt with a G not a J.

I really want to break my lease and move...
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ok, here is my note to all people in the world.

if you aren't even worth using for sex, then seriously, we're done.

it's one thing to blow me off like a million times, it's a completely worse fate for me not to even enjoy hanging out with you, and then you also REALLY suck at sex.

And also, please don't refer to yourself as...
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Wow...

my subtle attempts at dating have really blown up.

I am here, on a friday night currently being blown off.

this is becoming absolutely ridiculous.

tonight's plans were to be this guys way of rectifying the 3 other times he's blown me off. He really seemed sincere that we were going to go out tonight.

now, 2 hours after those plans being broken, I...
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gradually growing lamer and slipping further into my love of a hermit's life..

not like, some creepy hermit that I'm stalking, like, no, I don't love HIS life.

I just think I may pull an identity theft type of thing and go live in the woods.

by myself

*sigh*

sounds nice.