So I dont know if anyone reads this and really its not important if they do but Im going to write this anyway.
I dont know any of your experiences with family members with cancer but I found out that my dad has a type of liver cancer, really its bile duct cancer, but it may have spread in to his liver seeing as its right there and the abnormal cells are up there causing all kinds of mischief. So Ive been carting him back and forth from the hospital and home, watching over him and being his support (and really I dont mind doing that but its been defiantly hard on my emotionally).
Any way Ive realized that its hard to sleep the night before his surgeries, not that Im great at doing the sleep thing in general but this is a deferent type of sleeplessness. Its hard to fall asleep and hard to stay asleep. But any who Im sitting here in his living room writing this as he goes to be knowing that I have to get up at 3:30 am to drive him once again to the hospital for the most major surgery that hes gone through and its the most riskiest to date. With that being said its still fairly safe but its explorative surgery, and if the cancer has spread to far in to his liver and limp nodes then there is nothing that they will be able to do other then ease his pain until he goes.
So there has been lots of talks about what to do if he passes and that sucks but Im trying to keep my sprits high and my mind off the worst cause it may not even get all that bad, they may get it all and hell be fine. Over all I dont know what Ill do or what state of mind Ill be in if I lose my father but Im sure itll be hard on me, Im very close to my dad and well hes one of my best friends.
So Ill leave saying that if you have time with your father or mother spend time with them if you can. Or do what you want Im not here to tell you what to do or judge you, but I will tell you the experience that Im going thru.
SPOON
I dont know any of your experiences with family members with cancer but I found out that my dad has a type of liver cancer, really its bile duct cancer, but it may have spread in to his liver seeing as its right there and the abnormal cells are up there causing all kinds of mischief. So Ive been carting him back and forth from the hospital and home, watching over him and being his support (and really I dont mind doing that but its been defiantly hard on my emotionally).
Any way Ive realized that its hard to sleep the night before his surgeries, not that Im great at doing the sleep thing in general but this is a deferent type of sleeplessness. Its hard to fall asleep and hard to stay asleep. But any who Im sitting here in his living room writing this as he goes to be knowing that I have to get up at 3:30 am to drive him once again to the hospital for the most major surgery that hes gone through and its the most riskiest to date. With that being said its still fairly safe but its explorative surgery, and if the cancer has spread to far in to his liver and limp nodes then there is nothing that they will be able to do other then ease his pain until he goes.
So there has been lots of talks about what to do if he passes and that sucks but Im trying to keep my sprits high and my mind off the worst cause it may not even get all that bad, they may get it all and hell be fine. Over all I dont know what Ill do or what state of mind Ill be in if I lose my father but Im sure itll be hard on me, Im very close to my dad and well hes one of my best friends.
So Ill leave saying that if you have time with your father or mother spend time with them if you can. Or do what you want Im not here to tell you what to do or judge you, but I will tell you the experience that Im going thru.
SPOON