This is gonna be a lot of venting...
...
::shot of SoCo::
...
I hate change.
Fact.
I avoid it all costs when I can but sadly every so often it is pushed on me and I have to deal with it. Like a bunch months ago I was forced to fall in love. I don't mean that the girl held a gun to my head and said "love me or die". No no no! What happened was that I met someone in this town that came after me. She asked me on a date, which is shocking! Then I find out that this girl is fun and interesting and unlike any girl I've met. So given that right away I should have fell for her but held off a bit. Why? I haven't had luck letting people into my world. It's an odd place and the few people I've let in have left or turned on me. Protection of my heart is very important to me because I will be honest... it is weak. Easily breakable. Then I thought maybe she would be different. That she would be someone who would love me as much as I loved her and that everything would be perfect. Which brings us to now. Things never work out in the ways of the heart for me and now I'm a man with a shattered heart. Also I was left asking what it was about me? I thought I was a golden boyfriend! Things that I did during our time of dating? Well here is a small list of things that I did... used a work break to bring her medicine and a "Get Well" balloon, cooked all kinds of dinner for her, did everything in my power to make sure she was always comfortable and what I thought was happy. What are some things that I did wrong? I would a couple times go out when she had a late night of working and be passed out when she came over because I drunk feel asleep while waiting. Yeah... there is something else I don't know I'm sure. I have been freaking myself out for the past almost three weeks. What else did I do? What else could I have done to save it? But also why and I have a horrible time dealing with this? Seriously? What the fuck!
...
::does two shots of SoCo::
...
Ok! Had to clam down. Back. So we broke up and yet again I am even more scared of getting a broken heart again. How am I going to deal with you ask imaginary internet peoples talking to me? Well I really don't know. I don't really have a golden coping mechanism. Mostly I just dive deep into a sinful life of massive amounts of drinking, smoking, and eating crap food. So far it is working. Damn the world is something I yell a lot. But also finally I am writing a horror screenplay and if you want to know more about that let me know! Later fun peoples!
...
::shot of SoCo::
...
I hate change.
Fact.
I avoid it all costs when I can but sadly every so often it is pushed on me and I have to deal with it. Like a bunch months ago I was forced to fall in love. I don't mean that the girl held a gun to my head and said "love me or die". No no no! What happened was that I met someone in this town that came after me. She asked me on a date, which is shocking! Then I find out that this girl is fun and interesting and unlike any girl I've met. So given that right away I should have fell for her but held off a bit. Why? I haven't had luck letting people into my world. It's an odd place and the few people I've let in have left or turned on me. Protection of my heart is very important to me because I will be honest... it is weak. Easily breakable. Then I thought maybe she would be different. That she would be someone who would love me as much as I loved her and that everything would be perfect. Which brings us to now. Things never work out in the ways of the heart for me and now I'm a man with a shattered heart. Also I was left asking what it was about me? I thought I was a golden boyfriend! Things that I did during our time of dating? Well here is a small list of things that I did... used a work break to bring her medicine and a "Get Well" balloon, cooked all kinds of dinner for her, did everything in my power to make sure she was always comfortable and what I thought was happy. What are some things that I did wrong? I would a couple times go out when she had a late night of working and be passed out when she came over because I drunk feel asleep while waiting. Yeah... there is something else I don't know I'm sure. I have been freaking myself out for the past almost three weeks. What else did I do? What else could I have done to save it? But also why and I have a horrible time dealing with this? Seriously? What the fuck!
...
::does two shots of SoCo::
...
Ok! Had to clam down. Back. So we broke up and yet again I am even more scared of getting a broken heart again. How am I going to deal with you ask imaginary internet peoples talking to me? Well I really don't know. I don't really have a golden coping mechanism. Mostly I just dive deep into a sinful life of massive amounts of drinking, smoking, and eating crap food. So far it is working. Damn the world is something I yell a lot. But also finally I am writing a horror screenplay and if you want to know more about that let me know! Later fun peoples!