rudii

RUDII IS A GRUMPY RUDII

stupid festival means I'm in a bad mood all month, don't get me wrong we're in a recession and tourists are boosting our economy, but do they have to walk so slowly?
might be because I've had tooth ache all week and now have hay fever
or because 'i've had idiotic tourists asking if my shop sells batteries/ umbrellas/ stamps/ hairspray/ phone cards/ post cards etc all day......WE'RE AN ART SHOP WE SELL FUCKING PAINT YA DAFT TWAT HEIDS!!!!!!!!!
or maybe because all my friends are now single all of a sudden, which means I'm definitely gonna be single until they get new boyfreinds
(Edinburghs a small town with more girls than boys and all my freinds are VERY VERY HOT)
Usually on a night out guys try to chat up my mates and they get rebuffed then I try to charm by doing my impression of a baked bean on a fork

well i think its funny..................
now I'm more a failed heterosexual than ever haha

sigh.....

oh and since its the festival, clubs are open till 5, which means I get to wander the streets flyering people from 9.30 till 6 in the morning, WOO .....HOO

God I'm a misery guts at the moment. I need a serious shokuboku (spiritual kick to the head) (Gross point blank)
Actually I think I need a good fuck, it's long over due...............................

INTERESTING FACTS OF THE DAY...
I've been riding horses since I was 3 and came second in the national vaulting championships pairs competition when I was 9

I have a blow up doll signed by Chuck Palahnuik himself

I used to have a pet chicken named Chicky

After 18 driving lessons I still can't change gear and steer at the same time

My mum works with people with severe autism and has a theory that all men on some level all men are autistic. I concur.

When I go on a night out, I dance, A LOT, strangers ask me for drugs thinking I'm trashed...but no I just dance like that

The guy who has drawn The Dandy and The Beano and Dennis the Menace buys his pens at my shop, Tilda Swintons husband shops there too.

This blog was written whilst listening to my friend Ali's band The Young Fathers, they played on BBLB last week (I think thats something to do with big brother, I don't know I haven't watched TV in over a year)
Point being they're awesome listen to them and stuff

I'm going to go hibernate for a while and hopefully get out of my bad mood.....

oh and here's a picture of me looking like a crazy transvestite for your amusement


peace out rxxx