This whole last week has been a rough one. My mom's been living with bone cancer the last 2 yrs. The treatments have kept it from spreading but hasn't done shit to shrink it. Last week she had a scanning and it has gone from her shoulder down to her collar bone. And other tiny little spots have shown up down her spine with 2 little spots on her skull. Granted those little spots have not been biopsied but the doctors do believe it's spreading. So now they got her on a more aggressive chemo. And as with all the strong shit they give anyone. It really fucks with your stomach hard. Watching anyone in pain is rough but watching your mom is much worse. And add to that the fact that you are helpless to do anything about it. I never let her see that any of this affects me. I can't and I wont. Instead I watch several of the crappy tv shows that she likes so that when I talk to her I can distract her with what was on TV last night. And she can really go on and on about that. Also I spend a great deal of time trying to make her laugh. I have always had this ability or talent or as some may call It a superpower. It may not be much to some but I am so glad it is something I can do so effortlessly. Whenever anyone I talk to is depreseed or sad or very unhappy, I can always get that person to forget whatever it is that troubles them and then within a short time I will get them to laugh and keep on laughing. I am an exceedingly happy person who is able to infect others with my happiness. I was very much tested in my skill as I watched my mom clutching her stomach and writhing in pain. It was very draining and when I would leave her i drank a little more than usual and I would do whatever I could to distract myself from thinking about what's going on. Thankfully there are many things to distract myself with on SG, and there are many wonderful people on here to converse with. This may sound odd but I have always believed that laughter is the best medicine. A person who is laughing and happy has a better chance to fight off whatever it is that ails the them. It's not a cure. But just like being miserable and depressed can adversely affect your health, I see no reason not to think laughter can't do the same. I know this is long but last night I talked toy mom and the doctors had her stop taking this Chemo for now. They were worried it may be damaging her stomach. She sounded more like her old self and she sounded happy. I felt such an overwhelming sense of relief.
