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rp3215

Youngstown, OH

Member Since 2007

Followers 11 Following 21

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Sunday Apr 15, 2007

Apr 15, 2007
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ok so more of me whining about my boy problems... i guess thats what happens when your attracted to crazy people... well my over bearing, controlling boyfriend is now my ex-boyfriend... i fucked it all away... hes been in iraq since november and i cheated on him last night... i was going to be able to see him in 2 weeks... 2 fucking weeks and i couldnt keep my pants on... i wonder if i can blame me being unfaithful on him for "pushing me away because he is sooo possesive"... he already doesnt like and cried about me having male friends and even gets kind of pissy when i go out with chics because i'm not at home to talk to him 24/7.... he told me he would take me back if i told him who i cheated with so he can beat him up or whatever, stopped talking to all of my guy friends and never go out without him again, because i lost his trust... its kind of hard to lose someones trust when he never trusted me to begin with... he was constantly telling me i was cheating when i wasnt... i just did now... so today i was called a worthless whore like 20 times... i just feel so empty now... i really do love him i just wish he wasnt so NUTS! i really dont know what i'm going to do... i can only imagine how he will be now, now that i have given him a reason to not trust me... i dont know what i'm going to do... i do love him alot... he told me that "i cant believe i wanted to marry you" and i feel if i keep begging him to forgive me he will just have total control of me if we do get back together... i just am so confused... i dont know what to do... help me out guys... oh yeah i told him i wont give him the name of the guy that it happened with i dont feel that its necessary to tell him that, yes he knew i had a boyfriend but its not his fault i'm a "worthless whore"... i dont want to bring more added drama to his life..
cunninglinquist:
before I go to bed I will send you a message. You are human, and are not a worthless whore. I know there is more to the story than what you have told us and let's say I am on your side.
Apr 15, 2007
climbit:
I'm so sorry to hear that. There are so many things going on, not the least of which is the difficulty of a long distance relationship. Then you add in your boyfriend's insane jealousy and now telling him you slept with someone else. I hate to say it but I think its going to be difficult to ever make it normal again. You need to feel good about yourself and not let him make you feel awful. I'm sure you are going to feel bad for quite some time and now you are about to ship off to Iraq. Hopefully you will find peace quickly but I'd try to write it off and move on as quickly as possible. Clean slate as it were.
Apr 15, 2007

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