rozehead

i need a beer for this one.

nightmares and leg cramps plagued me last night. the cramps were immediate and lingering. the nightmare wasnt really scary until this morning when i remembered it.
delayed aftershock.

she wont leave my brain. that hateful, spiteful little thing wont go away. my subconscious has ensnarled her and she remains with me. my rational self knows the absurdity of this, desires nothing but to set her free. why have a locked her up so? geezus! wtf?

thinking back on the mess, i realize that this madman stuff originally began with a dream. why should i be surprised about last night? stupid brain

[-wavey lines-]
about a year ago she came to me one night. she was seated. i was kneeling in front of her with my head in her lap. i was weeping. stroking my hair she whispered Itll be all right. Everything will be all right. Shhhh.
[-wavey lines-]

even now, a fuckin year later, i can still sense the ultimate love i felt in that dream.

LSS-
apparently she was my own creation. reality collided with the dream and a year later everything went to shit (another delayed aftershock).
i tried to make her fit, but she only went half way. i guess im at fault. how do i move past this? do i need a new dream? a new reality? i need to really open my eyes.

-rozehead