roxy

I've been really cranky lately. Really, ever since I got back from Seattle. I'm not sure what's come over me, but I'm pissy, moody, suspicious, and it's no fun. I think maybe it's a combination of things: Firstly, my hormones are all outta whack. That *always* makes things bad. And I think leaving Seattle and my boy, both which I fell completely in love with, is also making it hard for me. Also I'm lonely here in New Jersey. Really, really lonely. No one in the city or surrounding area seems to want to hang out with me. And there's obviously not going to be a going away party. So I sit here. In the house, alone, all day. God it takes it's toll on someone. Ugh. And I can't work until tomorrow, and then not again until the weekend. I desperately need the money, and the excuse to leave the house for 8 - 10 hours. Plus there are some other things going on... And it all adds up to me acting like a bitch to everyone.

It's putting a strain on all of my relationships. It's putting a strain on my love with Tony (I won't go into detail), it's putting a strain on my friendships, it's even making it hard for me to talk to my mom.

Jesus, ten more days until I leave for Seattle. There I will have a wonderful city waiting for me, a boy who I hope will still want me after this week, and at least a friend or two... Plus a job, and several hobbies already lined up.

Please let these ten days fly.