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roxxee

Germany

Member Since 2003

Followers 359 Following 44

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Sunday Sep 19, 2004

Sep 19, 2004
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Dreams and Admissions of Humanity or the Musings of Someone Only Slightly broken

Dreams of Reality
I see you, you reveal those pearls behind your smiling lips. You spread those wings, those secret angel wings when I am kneeling, desperate, lost in my terrible circumstance. Those wings, glittering and downy reach toward me, strive to envelope me. They pulse slightly in time with the beat of your heart. They are as a demons to me. This softness, this sweetness, I do not understand. Alone. I am all alone. I am poison and unclean. Damaged. Your smile makes me ache. You hold the Heavens. They dance and pulse, the soft twinkling cracking my walls. My precious walls. You can see what is behind them. The filth and despair, they are mine to keep. The man I hold inside, he is screaming. The cold blue eyes wide and angered. The fury swells and breaks on the shore. Soft, salty breeze and now he is so distant. His berating cries drown in the sound of the ocean. The other man he weeps, covering his empty sockets with trembling hands. It is the walls that conceal him, protect him. I raise my gaze to you, daring to steal a glance. The sand is warm beneath my feet. Dont touch me, not that way. I will shatter. I will break. Cry rivers. Listen

Dreams of a Child I Once Was
Waiting for the darkness.
It moves. Swirling, twisting, contorting, envelopes, devours itself. Eyes to see, a mouth to feed.
Where were you when the lilac oil fell? Sharp shards and glittering bits sprayed in all directions. I cut my face, the glass penetrating deep. The red stickiness seeping down into my eyes. The fumes were so strong, I was dizzy love. Was it then that the darkness began to make its way?
They all said I was strange. I was shaking I think. Crazy they thought, but you knew better. I see them, I close my eyes and they are there holding my shame in their hands, horrible smiles. They look to the skies, inky blackness. Growing, shuddering, descending.
Where were you when the fire took my rose? It was a cigarette too close. The flames glowing red and orange and yellow. I could hear the crackling as if my precious flower were made of bones. Each one snapping as the heat consumed. I sat my love, watching it burn. Smiled at the warmth on my face.
They crane their necks, faces tilting upwards, arms outstretched. Desperate to grasp the darkness. I am not normal. I sit, legs crossed, cursing the void.
VIEW 21 of 21 COMMENTS
painted_lady:
I read your reply to my post on the Military Families group and all I can say is WOW you keep yourself busy! So you're into sewing? That's cool I learned when I was younger and started designing stuff for people in high school (how a made pocket money) it's good to know I'm not the only domestic nerd out there!

Also your writing skills are pretty slick too wink
Oct 3, 2004
attercap:
forgive the repetition, but once again, fantastic stuff! love
Oct 4, 2004

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