roulette

Rejection. I cant handle it. And yea you dont have to say it anymore...." you can do better Brooke"...blah blah. I know Ive heard it a million times.

I shattered my own pride and begged and begged and am still begging. Even though I know he gets off on it. I would do anything if he would just give it one more chance......But no, he says he's never coming back.

I dont understand. If you had someone who loves you more than the world and would do anything for you.....like I have.....Y would you just throw that away? And he even said that he believes he can find someone better for him. Thats the biggest load of bullshit Ive ever heard. There is no way in this fucked up world that he could ever find a girl that would love him like I have, for who he is, even after all the bullshit he's put me through these last five years. No one else would put up with it. Yet Im willing to put up with it till the day I die. Thats how much I love him.

Im beyond heartbroken. Ive never felt this bad in my life even though Ive been through this a million times with him. I can barely take care of my daughter. I cry nonstop. I cant eat and when I do it comes straight back up. I dont know what to do. Ive never hurt this bad over him before. They say time can heal anything. But I cant see that happening. Honestly I dont feel like time is on my side right now. I feel like nothing but a time bomb. But if what they say if true, then my entire heart and soul will turn into nothing but a huge bitter scar that will never quit bleeding.