I fear I'm a cylon. I know this is coming out of right field, but I'm starting to believe more and more every minute I breathe. How did this terrible mindfuck come about? Well I watched battlestar gallactica the new movie last night. Everything was going fine for a while. I was even OK with the fact the hot chick in red turned out to be a cylon. You see, cylons are no longer chrome toasters. They look like us. act llike us, they even fuck the same. Where was I, Oh yeah then they find this guy in a munitions supply satellite. Sort of an unshaved Bruce Willis with hair kind of deal. Turns out he's a cylon. Then a geeky looky PR guy - I guess that's redundant - on the battlestar turns out to be a cylon. Then a piece of equipment in plain view is found to be a cylon device! But wait here's where it gets scary - a cryptic note turns up that they only have 12 models. Next bombshell? The more than hot 1/2 oriental chick on borad is a cylon, but no one knows it except the audience watcvhing the show. So stay with me a while longer, here's where it gets interesting.
So we know there's only 12 models. We know these ARE cylons:
1. hot blonde chick in tight red dress
2. hot 1/2 oriental chick in uniform
3. guy who really needs a shave
4. geeky pr guy.
That leaves 8 unknown models. That's what freaks me out. Anyone of us can be a cylon and not even know it until we're activated!
Remember the weird piece of cylon technology that showed up on the battlestar? I'm walking out from the gym to my car, I reach into my pocket to get my keys and pull out this small device that unlooks the car door when you press a button. I can't explain how it works when I put one and one thogether and get three. Of course I don;t know how it works it's freakin' cylon technology and it's in my pocket. Is this the first step to being activated? Am I model number 5? Are there a hundred like me scattered throughout the universe? Does the human race even have a chance?
I don't know what to do or where to turn. If I tell someone, I know about those sneaky cylons, I risk the chance of getting toasted no questions asked. For now I'm just going to see what happens, keep an eye out for any other cylon technology I might recognize using in my everyday life. Is this why I crave tuna with all the weirdness thrown in? And it is getting progressively weirder what I throw in there. I just saw an add for 10lbs of grapes for $10. At first I thought what the hell would I do with 10lbs of grapes? I can see 8 or maybe even 9, but 10? Then it hit me. One word brought me to my senses - tuna.
So we know there's only 12 models. We know these ARE cylons:
1. hot blonde chick in tight red dress
2. hot 1/2 oriental chick in uniform
3. guy who really needs a shave
4. geeky pr guy.
That leaves 8 unknown models. That's what freaks me out. Anyone of us can be a cylon and not even know it until we're activated!
Remember the weird piece of cylon technology that showed up on the battlestar? I'm walking out from the gym to my car, I reach into my pocket to get my keys and pull out this small device that unlooks the car door when you press a button. I can't explain how it works when I put one and one thogether and get three. Of course I don;t know how it works it's freakin' cylon technology and it's in my pocket. Is this the first step to being activated? Am I model number 5? Are there a hundred like me scattered throughout the universe? Does the human race even have a chance?
I don't know what to do or where to turn. If I tell someone, I know about those sneaky cylons, I risk the chance of getting toasted no questions asked. For now I'm just going to see what happens, keep an eye out for any other cylon technology I might recognize using in my everyday life. Is this why I crave tuna with all the weirdness thrown in? And it is getting progressively weirder what I throw in there. I just saw an add for 10lbs of grapes for $10. At first I thought what the hell would I do with 10lbs of grapes? I can see 8 or maybe even 9, but 10? Then it hit me. One word brought me to my senses - tuna.