roguemind

My best friend in the entire world is y ex wife. We are... Umm.... Well we are. I could not ask for a better person. Something more then soul mates.(she said we are like soul mates). "The only person" in her life who is enough of a friend that she can truly let go and laugh with. Converse with. And have real conversations with. Yet we will never be together again like we once where. Friends is all it gets to be. Not what it should be. the reason I am not with this women is because we got married to young. There was still high school girl left in her. Other then that. We are perfect. I don't believe that there is one women to end them all. Just one who is waiting to walk into eternity with you. There is to much love out there. But she is as close as it comes and I can never tell her. Not even in the long and wondrous conversations we have late into the night. She is where she is and I am where I am. All I can hope for is reality. In reality I am dating a sweet and wonderful girl with an amazing little daughter of her own. We are great together. We could end life together and I would be perfectly fine with that. Yet there is my ex. The closest to the one. Currently the best friend you could ask for. Potentially the best partner. Formally? Can you be friends with the one who is the closest to perfection knowing that there is a 99.9% chance that it will never happen again and still be with some else that you are in love with? I am friends with my ex. She is the closest that my puny little mind can find to a perfect love. And partner and friend and shoulder and muse of laughter. Yet I am in love with wonderful women and her little girl.
This probably dose not come close to showing you what I feel right now. But it gives the general idea. /

Holy fuck.

What in the hell am I supposed to do?

-roguemind