And we held each other late into the night beneath the stars, The water reflected happiness. We where not far from the water fall with it's moon bow shimmering in the spray. We both shivered in the cold air but out mind never caught on. This was all there was. Love wrapped in my coat. Time would never be let loose again to bring havoc into an already imperfect world. There was no time anymore. Just us in the moon light forever.
No no no, wait a minute. I was day dreaming again. I do that when i get depressed or i see some happy couple prancing by me. I escape and forget I am not so lucky these days. You see, I lost my happiness three years ago. It was torn away from me while I was visiting Hawaii on vacation. I guess she forgot we where married and that i could tell when she broke a nail at work or if she for got to dot an 'I' on a research paper. We knew each other that well and yet she still tried to hide the fact that she cheated on my while I was away doing my own bit of thinking. I flew her out to paradise and she brought me a demon. I let myself forget what she told me for most of the time we spent there. IT was to be the last time I was happy and our last time to smile together and dance in the rain. Our luau got rained out but we did not even notice till the director told us we had to leave. I think we both felt it deep down that this would be the last time we could be together and not have any her problems riding on our shoulders.
Yes that was a dream. My mind was reminding me that once i had everything. I swear every day i will find it again. I even thought I had found it a couple times since we got divorced much it never panned out for one reason or another. But mind is wandering again. I have to run off to work. I have a thousand things that are wrong inside my head, but i somehow still managed to get my pH D and my own couch to sit people on so they can tell me their problems. At times i almost get angry at my patients. It seems selfish of them to lay their minds on my coffee table when i have my own problems to deal with. But i keep my head and remind my self that i asked for this. Not to mention they pay me one hundred dollars an hour to lay on my furniture while i record them and think about other shit.
Work was long and boring as per the norm. Nothing exciting at all. When i finally got sent home I stopped by good will to check out the books. I walked away with copies of 'the crucible' and 'the children of men'. I should really stop buying books. I have so many now on my list of things to read. And i guess thats it. See really exciting my life is.
-bloodyGIR

