robstradamus

based on real life events......

me: so, do you think you can sort out your highlight reels for when your life flashes before your eyes
jen: dunno
me: cuz what i'd like is for the very, very, very long reel of my lowlights, the stuff i just totally blew..
jen: i don't think it would be that long
me: ooh yeah, totally! I screw up all the time! especially with women. So, what i want is to run that reel and it'd be awful but i'd probably laugh at myself and then, run the short list of highlights, ya know, the stuff i got right. then i could end on a high note.
jen: i don't think it works that way, with the last moments and everything. i mean, maybe if someone isn't all doped up on morphine and is present maybe....
me: i think it's only in cases where you're in, like, a sudden car crash or plane crash or maybe a lion jumps out from behind a bush.
jen: yeah, i think you're probably right
me: now the trick is, when you're lying in your hospital death bed..... have a jaguar jump out of the closet!
jen: yeah but, how do you arrange that? and wouldn't it ruin the surprise?
me: no, you can't do it. that's where your friends or family have to step up and make it happen. somebody's gotta sneak a panther into the closet when i'm sleeping. c'mon jen, step up!
jen: riiiiight.
me: or maybe.... maybe you have someone walk in with a box of rattlesnakes! have em standing at the foot of your bed then suddenly, they throw a box of rattlesnakes at you! that'd do it i think. lying in your deathbed and suddenly you got a box of rattlesnakes hurlin' at your head!
jen: haha! yeah, that should probably do it!
me: just thinking about it might make it happen............AAHHGG!!.. there, i just got to kindergarten.......AAH!!....... first grade......