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robscarlett

Medieval Times

Member Since 2003

Followers 15 Following 20

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Sunday Jan 02, 2005

Jan 2, 2005
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"I'm not going to kill myself or anyone else." As far as mantras go this one is a good one to use at times. I'm using it now.
I hate having emotions. Sounds funny I admit..."hate" being in there and all. When I was young I had what the doctors called "emotional retardation" which means I hadn't developed emotions at the same rate or level as my peers. In fact I only had two fully formed ones....anger and hatred. This would have been a problem but I had also developed defence mechanisms to cope. I controlled everything that I let in and out and I developed wit.
As I grew and certain people helped me I became more aware of emotions and am now a fairly well rounded person. But I still have an endless supply of hate and anger...which is also why I have an almost endless supply of love and compasion.
Right now I really want to just drive to certain places and begin killing. Coldly. Then...move on.
Of course once I kill one person...well I can't stop there. I'd have to go on a mindless spree until I was taken down like a mad dog...tempting...but no.
I'll just pack it down. Wrap it in chains. Put it in the box. Wrap the box in chains. Lock the box. Throw it in the dark lake at the center of my being where it will go forgotten never to be heard from again. LALALLLALAAAI'MNOTLISTENINGABOUTHOWEMOTIONSRESURFACEBLAHBLAHBLAHLALALAAAAA
FLINTSTONES MEET THE FLINTSTONES!!LALALAAAAAA
*sigh*
I hope everyone is well. If there are any attractive females out there looking to give me pity sex...or...pity cuddles...let me know.
Take care.

Remember: - "If stupidity were painful you, my friend, would be crippled by it." -Me
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
hexek:
Wow, well I... ummm. ..... yeah.

So im just stoppin in sayin hi again. I hope your journal entry didnt reflect your new years. I hope the thoughts came from a little blue man that sits on your keyboard and tells you what to write, *he told me me to tell you that, and hes actually more aqua* but yeah, be happy.

I hope you eventually dont feel like killing anyone, especially me. *Huh* are you knocking at my door? AHH!

I uh, well, gotta go...... See yah.

And best wishes in the new year.
Jan 3, 2005
hexek:
Im proud to be part of the group.

Later bro,

till next time...
Jan 3, 2005

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