My heart is broken. My girlfriend just broke up with me. In an instant the life I had planned is gone. It's one of the weirdest feelings I've ever had. I...have no idea what's ahead. It's like driving into a thick fogbank at night with your highbeams on.
I feel empty...and yet...I can feel bitterness and anger filling the void.
I understand her reasons. I really and deeply do understand. I fight that understanding with bitterness and hate. Jealous thoughts come up with plans and schemes as to other whys.
I don't hate her. I love and miss her. Hate will come and that makes me sad.
Though my posts and comments might not indicte it I am a very bitte, angry, spiteful person. When I feel slighted I carry that forever, hrut me and I respond in Spades. I love very deeply when I do and when that love is torn and thrown away... *sigh*
She's too young and too far away. She needs time.
She tells me that this break isn't forever. I miss the time when I was foolish enough to beleive that could be true.
I could never take my own life, not for the reasons you might think. I made a promise to a friend who killed himself and those who he left behind.
It's times like this where I wish I'd never made that promise.
If anyone needs anything please let me know. I'm always willing to help if I can.
Take care.
Remember-"And so I leave this world, where the heart must either break or turn to lead."
- Nicolas-Sebastien Chamfort (Suicide note)
I feel empty...and yet...I can feel bitterness and anger filling the void.
I understand her reasons. I really and deeply do understand. I fight that understanding with bitterness and hate. Jealous thoughts come up with plans and schemes as to other whys.
I don't hate her. I love and miss her. Hate will come and that makes me sad.
Though my posts and comments might not indicte it I am a very bitte, angry, spiteful person. When I feel slighted I carry that forever, hrut me and I respond in Spades. I love very deeply when I do and when that love is torn and thrown away... *sigh*
She's too young and too far away. She needs time.
She tells me that this break isn't forever. I miss the time when I was foolish enough to beleive that could be true.
I could never take my own life, not for the reasons you might think. I made a promise to a friend who killed himself and those who he left behind.
It's times like this where I wish I'd never made that promise.
If anyone needs anything please let me know. I'm always willing to help if I can.
Take care.
Remember-"And so I leave this world, where the heart must either break or turn to lead."
- Nicolas-Sebastien Chamfort (Suicide note)
I know the whole world looks like shit but that's no reason to leave it. I know you're not planning to but even at rock bottom there are still laughs to be had.
http://evan.nixsys.bz/laughs/qwantz.py?c=comic2-14.png
That comic helps me, sometimes. When you feel like you have nothing to lose, live that way. Stay up way too late and watch TV. Do something stupid. Do a lot of stupid things. Do things to make it feel worthwhile to be you again. And if you need to chat, I'll be on AIM all night.
i cannot believe that! you really seem to love her so much. i hope she's understands it and comes back to you.
i'm only sorry that i can't be your head doctor 'cause don't really plan working with psychology. but if you need someone to talk, i'm here for you.
get better, please.