robosagogo

I love The Office, but despite being so funny it can also be extremely painful to watch. Oddly enough, however, all the depressing moments in the series lent it an aura of realism that made the happy ending feel like a credible conclusion (one that wouldn't be out of place in the real world). A moment to contemplate how pathetic it is to depend on fiction to sustain your optimistic world view.

So my dad called and left a message saying that I had returned Elf to Blockbuster without the second disc. I never rented Elf, but that's beside the point. This was the first time I'd heard from him since our argument three weeks ago and that was all he had to say. I had called him the day after he dropped me off to apologize (on his voicemail) for my part of things, but he never returned the call. It's probably for the best that we not talk to each other anyway.

I want to go to therapy again, but I doubt it would really help. Whatever meager benefit I could garner is outweighed by the possibility of my parents finding out I'd gone and hassling me over it. I'm not supposed to talk to anyone but them about my problems. My mom calls it the circle of trust (she really liked Meet the Parents).

Anyway, I'm doing alright in college. I've been going to classes and am moderately social. It's not enough though. I mean my goal was to get here and not fail like last time, but now that that's working out I realize that I've got nothing I want to strive for beyond that. It's bothersome, but I'm going to try to keep it from getting to me. I have to hold out hope that some path will present itself to me eventually.

P.S. I'm not afraid of the devil and I love Art Brut.

Next entry will be happy, I promise.