Well, I've been thinking about the dream since I had it. Not obsessing, but every hour or so...I ponder. The more I think about it, the more I think "Make out with a woman...sure. But, I don't see myself ever feeling any desire to do anything with her. In fact, I'd probably just get bored trying to make love." So, I investigated the dream farther.
I have been spending almost every second of my time alone with my daughters or with my husband and daughters. Every other Friday, I do meet up with a group of women for a class (they have a free nursery), but I don't know many of them very well. I just don't have a life outside of my family. That's where all my energy goes.
This past week, I've been feeling pretty sick. I don't know what kind of bug it is, because the symptoms change everyday. One day, I feel like puking. The next day, my throat feels like it's got gashes in it. But, that whole time I had to take care of kids and have dinner ready for my man when he came home. I did a pretty shitty job of that this week, though. Anyway, I'm rambling. The point is, I definitely could have used some gentleness and comforting. This is something I generally attribute to women. I just don't see men as comforters. I've never met ONE that would say "Oh, poor baby. You're sick. Let me go take care of your insane toddlers, while you lay here watching stupid shit on T.V. I'll be back with some chicken noodle soup. And, don't worry about the house. This time, I'll tidy up. Mwah." Men like this don't exist in my life....ever. And, I don't have any real female friends present in my life. But, I've definitely been needing someone like that while I've felt like complete shit....and there wasn't one.
That's why I think I had this dream. I think I was trying to find that sweet, comforting angel who would make everything all better. Of course, the only way to get her was to dream her up. And, goddamn, I was grateful!
So, now I'm feeling better and I'm cleaning up today. Time to be the adult again.
I have been spending almost every second of my time alone with my daughters or with my husband and daughters. Every other Friday, I do meet up with a group of women for a class (they have a free nursery), but I don't know many of them very well. I just don't have a life outside of my family. That's where all my energy goes.
This past week, I've been feeling pretty sick. I don't know what kind of bug it is, because the symptoms change everyday. One day, I feel like puking. The next day, my throat feels like it's got gashes in it. But, that whole time I had to take care of kids and have dinner ready for my man when he came home. I did a pretty shitty job of that this week, though. Anyway, I'm rambling. The point is, I definitely could have used some gentleness and comforting. This is something I generally attribute to women. I just don't see men as comforters. I've never met ONE that would say "Oh, poor baby. You're sick. Let me go take care of your insane toddlers, while you lay here watching stupid shit on T.V. I'll be back with some chicken noodle soup. And, don't worry about the house. This time, I'll tidy up. Mwah." Men like this don't exist in my life....ever. And, I don't have any real female friends present in my life. But, I've definitely been needing someone like that while I've felt like complete shit....and there wasn't one.
That's why I think I had this dream. I think I was trying to find that sweet, comforting angel who would make everything all better. Of course, the only way to get her was to dream her up. And, goddamn, I was grateful!
So, now I'm feeling better and I'm cleaning up today. Time to be the adult again.
VIEW 8 of 8 COMMENTS
had_matter:
I used to make tea and go shopping for this one female friend (not a girlfriend) when she was sick.
ontothenext:
heyy im a woman... 