There is a moment I look at the clock and go, "Well here I am and I know I must be somewhat drunk because it's that hour everyone else who is normal is asleep and .. oh .. wait .. let's open another beer and take some double shots." Why? Because things are broken.
Gather around ladies and gentlemen, children of every background, gather around him and hers and they and thems! Let us have a little carnival of busted ass things that for some reason we, in the United States, still do!
I present unto you all our main event! Why bother hiding the lead when it's already the elephant in the room? The name of this elephant is the "Electoral College!" That nifty thing pretty much no other democratic country bothers with but hey! Why stop now? It's like our thing. Everyone has a thing. There's that comic who tapes his mouth closed and goes all crazy eyes with his make-up, that's his thing. Henry Rollins was all about being barefoot on a carpet with a microphone wrapped thirty-two times around his epic fist because he needed a thing. So we got a thing. The "Electoral College." This arcane, mysterious, piece of pure idiocy designed so the ravenous mob of idiots can't have a real say in who gets to lead the nation. But wait! Wait. Whispers int he background ask, "Didn't we end with Dubya? Didn't we end up with Trump?"
Why yes my fine folk! We did! Because you see, this is a -thing- that can get manipulated. If you factor in the vast majority of the nation lives in a handful of states, and then you just ignore them and go the folk who mean well but are generally struggling on the education and information? You too can be President while getting the minority of the vote! Because this is a thing!
Hey you! Kid! Wanna be a President? You can be a President. As long as you don't impress. Hey you! Kid! Wanna be a President? You can be a President. As long as you arrest .. black folk, the unemployed, gay men, the unenjoyed, lesbians, the .. well I'm not fucking Steven Sondheim so I can only keep the tune to Assassins for so long.
You get the point.
The Electoral College isn't a road-map to victory. It's a road-map to the political minority telling the rest of us what to do. Like don't get abortions. Don't have anal sex. Don't cry foul when a black or brown man or woman gets shot dead in the street, in their home, while just chilling in a drive-thru, due to little fault of their own. Don't freak about guns when children, the elderly, your mother, or you get dismembered for absolutely no reason. Like. Seriously. You didn't vote for any of this but why bother? You don't need to anymore. They got it covered. For us all.
So, broken system number one? Electoral College.
Broken system number two? The Senate. Yeah, yeah, I get it. There was some brilliant idea that states should have equal representation somewhere in the government. But should they? Really, figure this one out. Should North Dakota representing 0.02% (Disclaimer: That is probably not an accurate number but sounds stupid good to me) of the nation's population get anywhere akin to equal representation of, let us say, California? Both get two Senators. Really? Because one apple is definitely equal to that single blade of grass just under the tree?
Figure this. In a political duel California, representing the bulk majority of the nations population and GDP, gets equal footing against North Dakota who does .. what? Survives winter? Abuses the native population? Contracts COVID because they are all scared of vaccinations and dies? This is equal in what world? What government?
This is a broken system. 100 people decide shit happens or shit doesn't. And this doesn't make any sense. Really. It doesn't.
But hey, you wanted to have a government? You can have a government.
There are more ways things are broken! Maybe, when I'm drunk and awaiting dawn once more in this wild and crazy world we live in I'll talk about it more.
Maybe I won't.
Have a cute day kids living in this busted ass world we live in.
Maybe some of us will vote and change it?
Eh. Maybe I can be the President.