rilee

Today.
I discoverd.
I am a selfish person..
.....

my guyfriend, who has grown into my bestfriend, finally told me after acting strange and me asking all morning what was wrong, that he's been "feeling weird" for the past couple of days... doesn't know 'exactly what' it is...
"I didn't do anything wrong"
He's "not interested in anyone else"
But he's at a crossroads with his career that he went into over a year ago after coming home with a degree from berklee....
It hasn't amounted to much of anything and isn't paying the bills.
He says he needs to 're-evaluate everything'...
including us I guess.
Everything's been so great. This is coming out of nowhere. Just last night he told me he loved me before I went out 4 times in a 6 minute phone conversation.
I don't understand.
And i'm so hurt. And I feel that me feeling hurt, is wrong.
Even though he said those things, I still feel like I did something, and am assuming the worst. Everything's always about me I guess....... I can't help feeling this way though...
I should be supportive.
I should be okay with whatever decision he needs to make, as long as it makes him happy and is good for him.
I shouldn't care that that might mean the end of us, as long as it's better for him..
right.
But I just can't.
I am so crushed right now.



Lovedrug- Down Towards the Healing