I've been thinking about what the hell to talk about on this blog for like three days now. I went back and forth between my weightloss (diet and fitness) or talk more about gaming (Which could talk for days about but I have nothing specific to mention) So maybe I'll do both.
So about six months ago I weighed around 215-220. I wasn't feeling too proud of myself. I've always been a bit conscious about my weight. It's something that's always bothered me. My brother had managed to lose a little over 100 pounds. He was 290 at his max he now is 185 and gaining muscle. I saw him through his whole transformation and it bothered me that I didn't have the motivation to do something about it. Eventually the last straw was when a childhood friend and long time crush compared us both and called me cute and him handsome. That was it. I wouldn't let that happen I would do something about this. My crush was moving out of state but planned to move back in two years time so I decided to look better, way better, by the time she came back. I took up weight lifting and a new diet my brother helped me with. After six months and lots of sweat and hungry days I've dropped to 183 (so far). I lost around 35-40 pounds of fat and I've only been gaining muscle the last few months due to the weight lifting. The last two months I've been stuck around the 185 (because I assume my weight loss was at the same ratio as I was gaining muscle.) It wasn't until I broke the plateau and got under 185. I'm happy that I could but my over all goal is to get to 175. Everyday I'm getting closer but in reality I'm taking my time with this.
Eventually it became about feeling better than looking good for someone else. Due to some recent news I discovered my crush was going to stay out of state likely long than she anticipated and I was oddly OK with that. Not that I don't want to see her but it became obvious nothing was ever going to happen between us and the news didn't hinder my exercise. I was feeling good and happy with myself that I didn't need to do this for someone else. I'm doing it for myself.
This weight-loss is almost scary sometimes though. I look in the mirror and see me but I'm not used to my look. My face looks elongated. My legs are thinner. Facial hair grows faster. My gay friends don't call me a bear anymore (which I actually appreciate). My old clothing doesn't fit anymore. I have to wear belts all the time. Those are just some "side-effects" about the weight-loss. Which aren't really troublesome but are kinda annoying at points and maybe surreal. I didn't ever think I would get out of my weight slump and now here I am. Though my ego has grown considerably, which self esteem itself isn't a bad thing but at the same time I feel like I'm looking for complements about my weight-loss. I want to look up old friends and see what they say. I have friends touch my stomach to feel my abs. I've been looking at the mirror a considerably longer time than I used to. The thing is I've never really had much pride in myself and when this started happening everything changed. Everyone is saying how proud they are. It's all so weird to me. I've been used to the idea of being a black sheep of sorts. Friendly to everyone and everyone's friend but always in the back. Now I feel like I'm been bumped up to center stage and I don't know exactly how to react to it. I almost feel like I should tap dance to stage exit. Though at the same time I enjoy this new attention and the admiration from friends, family and co-workers. Some of my friends even took up exercising in response to some of the stuff I've been doing. (more like they have been forced into it by their girlfriends).
Really, I'm trying to stay humble the best I can. I've gone through a lot with this stuff and I feel like I've been rewarded but at the same time I should be responsible and make sure I don't let it go to my head.
OK so I only ended up talking about my weight loss and it turned longer than I imagined. Tomorrow I'll talk about gaming and stuff.
So about six months ago I weighed around 215-220. I wasn't feeling too proud of myself. I've always been a bit conscious about my weight. It's something that's always bothered me. My brother had managed to lose a little over 100 pounds. He was 290 at his max he now is 185 and gaining muscle. I saw him through his whole transformation and it bothered me that I didn't have the motivation to do something about it. Eventually the last straw was when a childhood friend and long time crush compared us both and called me cute and him handsome. That was it. I wouldn't let that happen I would do something about this. My crush was moving out of state but planned to move back in two years time so I decided to look better, way better, by the time she came back. I took up weight lifting and a new diet my brother helped me with. After six months and lots of sweat and hungry days I've dropped to 183 (so far). I lost around 35-40 pounds of fat and I've only been gaining muscle the last few months due to the weight lifting. The last two months I've been stuck around the 185 (because I assume my weight loss was at the same ratio as I was gaining muscle.) It wasn't until I broke the plateau and got under 185. I'm happy that I could but my over all goal is to get to 175. Everyday I'm getting closer but in reality I'm taking my time with this.
Eventually it became about feeling better than looking good for someone else. Due to some recent news I discovered my crush was going to stay out of state likely long than she anticipated and I was oddly OK with that. Not that I don't want to see her but it became obvious nothing was ever going to happen between us and the news didn't hinder my exercise. I was feeling good and happy with myself that I didn't need to do this for someone else. I'm doing it for myself.
This weight-loss is almost scary sometimes though. I look in the mirror and see me but I'm not used to my look. My face looks elongated. My legs are thinner. Facial hair grows faster. My gay friends don't call me a bear anymore (which I actually appreciate). My old clothing doesn't fit anymore. I have to wear belts all the time. Those are just some "side-effects" about the weight-loss. Which aren't really troublesome but are kinda annoying at points and maybe surreal. I didn't ever think I would get out of my weight slump and now here I am. Though my ego has grown considerably, which self esteem itself isn't a bad thing but at the same time I feel like I'm looking for complements about my weight-loss. I want to look up old friends and see what they say. I have friends touch my stomach to feel my abs. I've been looking at the mirror a considerably longer time than I used to. The thing is I've never really had much pride in myself and when this started happening everything changed. Everyone is saying how proud they are. It's all so weird to me. I've been used to the idea of being a black sheep of sorts. Friendly to everyone and everyone's friend but always in the back. Now I feel like I'm been bumped up to center stage and I don't know exactly how to react to it. I almost feel like I should tap dance to stage exit. Though at the same time I enjoy this new attention and the admiration from friends, family and co-workers. Some of my friends even took up exercising in response to some of the stuff I've been doing. (more like they have been forced into it by their girlfriends).
Really, I'm trying to stay humble the best I can. I've gone through a lot with this stuff and I feel like I've been rewarded but at the same time I should be responsible and make sure I don't let it go to my head.
OK so I only ended up talking about my weight loss and it turned longer than I imagined. Tomorrow I'll talk about gaming and stuff.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
The best part about weight loss is having to wear belts until you buy new clothes! accomplishment!
As far as the hopefuls, different people have different philosophies. Some people just add everyone. Personally I enjoy back and forth conversations and try to read everyone's blog posts so I tend to only follow people who have at least a tiny bit of genuine interest in actually being my 'friend'.