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richard_

St. Louis

Member Since 2004

Followers 150 Following 327

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Sunday Feb 26, 2012

Feb 26, 2012
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I've survived a horrible childhood. Been that boy who never knew a home. My father was a violent alcoholic. My mother did everything she could to leave this world behind. I begged. I stole. Burned opportunity to the ground. Was in jail more times than I can count. Prison almost twice. I survived marriage. Divorce. War. A mind which torments me to create things constantly, and a heart that can evidently never say no.

But my dream I find is dead again. My world built upon the hope that another shared my goal. All seems hopeless to me now. The future dark, unknown.

I have no use for being human any longer, for it only brings me pain. So I become a robot now. Immune. Detached. Insane.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
luffy:
That's why you can't build your dreams around anyone else. Don't become a robot. That's just giving in to what "THEY want" I know its hard, but please know that you are in my thoughts. Every day I struggle with being the person I am, and not being where I want to be. But every day is a new chance to move towards being the person you want to be. So in words you said to me. You must survive!
kiss
Feb 27, 2012
ambientlight:
A tough road to travel... especially for one with such a kind heart and poetic soul.

But it is when we are made to stand alone and seemingly quagmired, that we can find out who we are and what we are truly made of... and what is we truly yearn for. I have called this The Abyss. If you can dispel the shadows from the past, you can find out what is truly REAL in your present. We have ALL done things in the past that we are not proud of... but, if we don't let these define us, we instead learn from them and grow. Think of all the shit from your past, merely as fertilizer.

At times like these, desensesitation is a good thing in the short term... it helps negate the taunts and jabs of jerks who invariably show-up at times like these, to feed off you when you're down.

I have no doubt, that when you get through this and discard the ghosts of the past... you will discover yourself to be the truly awesome person we all here know you to be. And from this, find empowerment and a renewed sense of purpose to realize your life according to your vision.

I wish you strength and peace my friend...
Feb 28, 2012

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