richard_

Jesus cristo..... Its late, i get the munchies, so i take a stroll to the neighborhood house of burgers for a lil latenight snacking. As im ordering what im sure will be the absolute best tastin damn burger ive had in quite some time, the neanderthal taking my order pinches out an audible fart.

Me: Did you just fucking bust ass while taking my order dude???

Neanderthal Burger Dude: I didnt hear anything.

Me: Ok, so you didnt hear the About to Fart Bells ringing in your ass prior to the incident taking place, but now that its actually happened, can you at least fucking smell what you've done??

Neanderthal Burger Dude: It was an accident man.... no reason to get all mad n shit.

Me: Great.... thanks a lot dude! Not only did you literally fart in my mouth while it was watering in expectation of a sure to be totally tasty treat, now you've gone and thrown some shit in it as i was simply asking you wtf??

Neanderthal Burger Dude: Sorry man.... they always smell REALLY really bad when i eat here twice in one day.

Me: Thanks for the warning dude, hope you have a good life!

So now im eating potato chips n drinkin ice cold ones while looking at virtual boobies from my couch, totally NOT craving that burger anymore.