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Dirty Souf

Member Since 2004

Followers 42 Following 33

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Thursday May 07, 2009

May 7, 2009
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I've been watching a lot of Macguyver lately. I own the DVDs and they totally rule.

I've been waiting to post this because I hate typing, but the story must be told.

I've been sleeping on an air mattress now for a couple of months while being lazy about moving my bed to the new apartment. Well, Tuesday morning I put my elbow down into the mattress to help facilitate rolling my fat ass carcass over, and wouldn't you know it... My elbow goes right through the top of the mattress. I just laid back down while the bed deflated thinking about how lame this was. Suddenly my inner MacGuyver kicks in. I get up, go into my bathroom and cut a chunk out of my shower curtain (I had already bought a new one, but in an extended fit of laziness had neglected to put it up for several weeks), I get some super glue, and I glue this square of shower curtain over the hole. Unfortunately, I glued it too close to the edge of said hole, so.... Back to the bathroom to remove a smaller section of the shower curtain, overlap the first patch with this piece to cover the rest of the hole properly. BAM! Shit got fixed! Right?

Well, as fate would have it after re-inflating the bed I could still hear a minor leak coming from it. So repeat shower curtain gluing to the bed a third time to cover said leaks. I had been putting my ear right next to the patches this whole time to listen for any possible leaks, which I would locate and attempt to block with glue. Now, as we all know, working with super glue is often a messy affair, and of course my fingers were covered in super glue. However at one point while putting my ear to the patch I managed to get some glue (which I thought was dried dammit!) on my forehead. While attempting to remove this spot from my forehead, I noticed a very minuscule amount was also in my eyebrow. I foolishly attemted to extract it which resulted in me accidentally waxing my eyebrow, not the whole thing, but just a chunk at the edge. Later that night I even found some glue in my hair. Fail.

The end result is a bed I have to re-inflate every night before laying down, and waking up every morning sleeping on the floor, as the mattress has completely deflated whilst I was sleeping, and a partially waxed eyebrow. I have now realized that I am definitely not MacGuyver.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
samling:
your lazy makes my lazy look OCD fastidious.
May 8, 2009
hopey:
Hahahaha! I would have paid money to watch that fucking process. Jesus christ, move your bed in!!!
May 9, 2009

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