revanche

I hate waking up with a panic attack. It's probably one of the single worst feelings in the world. It blurs the line between physical and emotional. I feel like I've tried everything you can think of: therapy, various anti-anxiety meds, changing the levels of estrogen and progesterone in my body, outlook adjustments, life changes, self-mutilation, meditation, exercise, dietary alterations, and yet the older I become, the worse the attacks get. No one I know seems to really understand how this feels so most tend to take it lightly. It's literally like being torn apart from the inside. I am sick to death of living in pain.