rephrased

Phone call

Me: T_ B_________ Mortgage, this is [Phased]
Dad: Hi, Boy! (My father refuses to call me by name).
Me: (thinly veiled contempt) Hey dad.
Dad: Listen, I'm gonna do you a favor. I met this girl. No, no, these two girls...
Me (interrupting): Dad, I appreciate the thought but...
Dad (talking over the interruption): ... and I'm telling you they're really cute girls, you gotta check them out, real great...
Me (interrupting again): Dad, I'm not...
Dad (still talking): ...and anyway, they just got hired by your company and they're going to be at your office next week for training and...
Me (still trying to interrupt): Dad...
Dad (unstoppable): ... and I really think you'd be into at least one of them and...
Me: DAD!
Dad: Huh? What?
Me: Dad, I'm not interested.
Dad: Well tough shit. I gave them your phone number and showed them your picture. I told them you'd take them both out to lunch.
[pause]
Me: Dad, are you trying to set me up with 16-year-olds again?
[pause]
Dad: Age is just a number.
Me: I have work to do. Goodbye.
Dad: You will take them out to lunch, right? I'm telling you, they're hot and I bet they'd...
Me: Goodbye, Dad.

-Phased Out