renegadefuzz

status: feeling odd-- parts of me happy. parts of me not. slightly covered in paint.

part of me is happy.. got to hang out with my sis and her friends and have fun with that.. got to paint, and will be painting tomorrow as well. I also got to cuddle with my sis's friend Red, and she's a sweet heart. she's as touch crazy as...
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I'm so not looking forward to this, but I'm going to have to start writing papers soon.. But what I should be thankful for is the fact that my teachers are willing to give me a break and be understanding with me. And for that-- I am thankful... I just don't want to write. I don't like scholarly writing, not at all. I guess it's...
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in other news.. things are going well.. life is going well... for a while I'm happy. I'm fully aware that this happiness will be short lived and that I won't have much chance at it later, but for now, I'm happy. I'm perhaps finding my own little slice of heaven and it makes me happy. But yeah. Happy until the 27th... lol



happy holidays everyone!...
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you know that feeling that one gets... when you're in a situation that you know you don't want to fuck up but you just end up feeling awkward? Where there are things that you can't control, pasts you can't change, and opinions that you're not sure of? Where everything seems fabulous, and then you realize that it's on the brink of going to hell and...
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so I just had to admit to my mother how crappy this semester really went. I had to ask her for the fax number to her work so that my directing professor could send me an incomplete form for her class. Yeah. Not exactly something I was proud of. This really was not a good semester. Just thinking about it still makes me cry. I've...
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So of course, the final went horribly. But then, what can one expect for not studying? I've got more papers to write as well, and those have to be dropped off at my professor's house today-- hopefully she might take some tomorrow as well.. She knows that my semester and mentality are not the best as of late, and I believe of my professors, she...
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yeah, so I'm ignoring the fact that I have a final in a little less than two hours. I should be studying my ass off... but that's not happening. I shuld be pouring over books and trying to find out what the hell an "Ekkyklema" is. But-- no hope. Nope. None. Why? because I'm tired.. I'd rather sit around.. perhaps take a shower.. find someone...
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So earlier today I had a plan. I know of something that I was going to write about but now I can't remember a damn word of it. I even thought "Shyte! I should write about this in my journal!! immediately!" and then of course, I didn't have time, and therefore forgot.

oh well.. there are other things to discuss... like the fact that I'm...
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so there is just something about it. I'm not quite sure what, but there is something absolutely delicious when one is just sitting around all comfy in a towel or a bathrobe after taking a nice long shower. It's quite pleasant and makes me realise that this feeling would perhaps even encourage me to take two or three showers a day. Not that that would...
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so there are times when I just feel empty. I've no real way to describe it. I just don't know what to do or how to feel... I just feel like something is missing.

I had a discussion with a friend, well, a guy who wants to be more than friends. He asked me why I wouldn't. I told him I was afraid... afraid of...
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