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renegadefuzz

Stoughton, WI

Member Since 2005

Followers 44 Following 45

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Saturday Apr 16, 2005

Apr 15, 2005
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dunno what it is with me, but I think I have a thing about posting journals at 2am. I guess that's just the end-all of my day.

So I met with the Nemesis. I was strong, fought bravely, and heard the speech that I hear over and over again. I guess I just don't know what to do anymore... anyone particularily good with basic calculus? Wanna tutor me? I dunno. I've given up hope. I'm basically going to do the homework, and then screw the practice homework, and just work on studying "How do I solve this problem?" Then, whenever I test, I'm going to work on getting what I know for sure, and then letting him know where I get lost... maybe that will help me some. My friend told me that when she took his class, he had her convinced she was failing but she ended up with a B. I'd be happy with a B. Hell, I'd be pleased with a C, but I hope to do better than that.

Tonight was fun. We ended up going outside with a bunch of squirt guns that we stole (borrowed.. did ask) from Theta Chi, and soaking the shit out of each other. There were maybe like ... oh.. say... 7 of us? It was a generally good time. I got inspired afterwards to be all showery and girly. I even think that before I go to sleep I will give myself a pedicure. So my hair is all fancy and I've got makeup on, and all sorts of things like perfume.. it's a rare moment. Normally I live my life as "Am I wearing pants? Yes. Fantastic - carry on."

So I watched Godzilla at theta chi tonight. It was fun. Afterwards I ended up hanging with Megan1123 in her room, and drinking. So this journal entry is me typing on about 5-6 shots of vodka in succession, plus some wop, plus some tequila, and one shot of rum. I think I'm doing rather well actually. But it is getting time for me to go to sleep... so anyway.. here's some semi-drunken poetry... don't be a harsh judge.. I never aspired to be a writer...

***

breathing

feeling spaces while wishing
for them to be filled.

imagined face
trying to believe it's real

hoping
craving the feel of soft breath
next to me as I sleep.
empty spaces

waiting
for them to be filled.
waiting
for it to be real.

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