So I guess I ought to update you all on things that are happening. This is NOT a cheery blog, so if you want sunshine and light go elsewhere...
Where to start.
We are broke. I'm desperatley trying to suport both me and Andy on my wage. This wouldn't be a problem except that I have debts to pay off as well as the usual bills etc...Andy can't claim JSA while he is looking for a job as apparently he has not contributed enough class 2 and my wage should be sufficient for us both. Not so - and I am rapidly sinking trying to pay everything.
The car is dead - almost. Both of them. We bought a VW Golf last year under the proviso that Andy's best mate, a mechanic, would do it up for us. He hasn't. It has been sat on his drive for a year, and as a result when another mechanic came to look at it he told us it would be AT LEAST 600 to get it back on the road. Can't help but think that if Andy's mate had got his thumb out it would have been a hell of a lot less. It would have been nice if Andy had got onto him more about it too, but he has to be nagged to do anything. I love him dearly, but I get so exasperated having to yell at him to do ANYTHING.
The car we currently use has been leaking from the fuel pump for some time. Andy's mum (bless her) has been paying for the mechanic it to look at it - 3 times so far. He kept telling us it was fixed - rubbish. The last time she took in for us (As you see - Andy did not even deal with this. Its alway me or his mum) he told us it was beyond repair - more than the car was worth to fix it. So soon we shall be car-less. Great, considering we live in York and all our friends and relatives are at least an hour and a half away, and some nowhere near a bus/train link. Fuck.
Then there comes the reason we moved to York in the first place. Some of you may remember how excited I was about moving, despite the problems we faced getting a place at the time. Well, have been here about 5 months now. The flat is still fabulous - the job is not. I hate it. Words cannot express how much. I have been getting migraines (never had em before) and panic attacks just thinking about the place. Went to see my GP on Wednesday, she told me to take a week off self cert, take some MORE anti-anxiety pills and go see her again weds morning to see if I need to be signed off. I was shaking and sweating when I went to see her - it seems I can't even cope with a trip to the docs atm. I didn't want to go down the stress and depression route again - been there, done that. Don't seen like I have any control over it though - I should have known I wouldn't. When it gets to much common sense fails and you can't help how you react I guess.
All in all, things are not so good at the moment.
Where to start.
We are broke. I'm desperatley trying to suport both me and Andy on my wage. This wouldn't be a problem except that I have debts to pay off as well as the usual bills etc...Andy can't claim JSA while he is looking for a job as apparently he has not contributed enough class 2 and my wage should be sufficient for us both. Not so - and I am rapidly sinking trying to pay everything.
The car is dead - almost. Both of them. We bought a VW Golf last year under the proviso that Andy's best mate, a mechanic, would do it up for us. He hasn't. It has been sat on his drive for a year, and as a result when another mechanic came to look at it he told us it would be AT LEAST 600 to get it back on the road. Can't help but think that if Andy's mate had got his thumb out it would have been a hell of a lot less. It would have been nice if Andy had got onto him more about it too, but he has to be nagged to do anything. I love him dearly, but I get so exasperated having to yell at him to do ANYTHING.
The car we currently use has been leaking from the fuel pump for some time. Andy's mum (bless her) has been paying for the mechanic it to look at it - 3 times so far. He kept telling us it was fixed - rubbish. The last time she took in for us (As you see - Andy did not even deal with this. Its alway me or his mum) he told us it was beyond repair - more than the car was worth to fix it. So soon we shall be car-less. Great, considering we live in York and all our friends and relatives are at least an hour and a half away, and some nowhere near a bus/train link. Fuck.
Then there comes the reason we moved to York in the first place. Some of you may remember how excited I was about moving, despite the problems we faced getting a place at the time. Well, have been here about 5 months now. The flat is still fabulous - the job is not. I hate it. Words cannot express how much. I have been getting migraines (never had em before) and panic attacks just thinking about the place. Went to see my GP on Wednesday, she told me to take a week off self cert, take some MORE anti-anxiety pills and go see her again weds morning to see if I need to be signed off. I was shaking and sweating when I went to see her - it seems I can't even cope with a trip to the docs atm. I didn't want to go down the stress and depression route again - been there, done that. Don't seen like I have any control over it though - I should have known I wouldn't. When it gets to much common sense fails and you can't help how you react I guess.
All in all, things are not so good at the moment.
VIEW 15 of 15 COMMENTS
Well....are you staying?
Staying? Where? Here?! I'm sticking around for a while yet
Sounds like you're having a shitty time at the moment. I know how you feel about the car thing - I've had 2 go in the last year and I live right out in the mountains. We're talking 2 buses a day. I'm stuck with one that's just about getting me from place to place now. It's rubbish! If the job's getting to you that much though, go looking for others. Sometimes even just the act of allowing yourself to accept you can be free of the crap (or at least have a break with some different crap) can be enough to make a good change and get you feeling better.
Take care xxx
So far this weekend has been good. Saw some friends last night, and today has consisted of a LONNNNGGGG lay in, a toast bacon sarnie, SG and some tasty music in the background.
You got any plans yourself?